Forever Bond, or How I Learnt To Stop Worrying And Love The Bum
jetsetwilly
Liverpool, UKPosts: 1,048MI6 Agent
Are you a Bond fan? Are you gay? Have you wished for something that combined your two interests of 007 and hot man on man action? Then look no further:
http://www.amazon.co.uk/Forever-Bond-Various-Artists/dp/B000IY0198/ref=pd_ka_1/026-0944721-0357214?ie=UTF8&s=music&qid=1173213133&sr=8-1
People,this is officially the gayest album of Bond covers ever made. Possibly the gayest album full stop. I've owned it for a week, and I still can't believe how mox it is. It should come with a free bottle of Amyl Nitrate and a muscle T. This is, basically, cover versions of ten Bond themes (the famous ones everyone has heard of) with a pounding, Eurobang remix behind it. To give you an idea of how thoroughly homo this is, I spoke to a friend (who is also good with colours) the other day about it. Our conversation went:
Me: "I just bought a CD of gay Bond covers."
Friend: "Why is it gay?"
Me: "Kelly Llorenna does All Time High."
Friend: (admiringly) "Jesus Christ."
Yes, La Llorenna is on here, doing her patented too-many-Bacardi-breezers-at-the-karaoke-hen-night warbling over Rita Coolidge's "classic". For Your Eyes Only sounds like it's wearing chaps - hysterically, there's about two minutes of banging beats before it just stops for the ballady singing, before going into the house music again - and Rozalla manages to push Diamonds Are Forever so far over the edge of gayness that even Graham Norton would baulk at going there. The A View To A Kill cover begins with, and heavily emphasises, the refrain "on your body" - subtle. This is the most poofy thing to hit the world of Bond since Alan Cumming.
To be honest, it's actually way too gay for me; I don't take enough ecstasy to really appreciate its subtle nuances. Preview it on iTunes, but don't download it off there, because if you buy the CD you get a bonus "mash up" CD which is the whole lot threaded together in a big orgy of sweaty homosexual gloriousness; it's like Brighton: the Musical. And please, please buy it, because I want to hear Forever Bond 2: the idea of Kelly Llorenna forging the rock antics of Chris Cornell into a handbags in the air anthem is just too wonderful to contemplate.
PS: this album was produced by John Barry, but before you start worrying that all that business with Jane Birkin was just a front, don't panic; it's someone with the same name.
http://www.amazon.co.uk/Forever-Bond-Various-Artists/dp/B000IY0198/ref=pd_ka_1/026-0944721-0357214?ie=UTF8&s=music&qid=1173213133&sr=8-1
People,this is officially the gayest album of Bond covers ever made. Possibly the gayest album full stop. I've owned it for a week, and I still can't believe how mox it is. It should come with a free bottle of Amyl Nitrate and a muscle T. This is, basically, cover versions of ten Bond themes (the famous ones everyone has heard of) with a pounding, Eurobang remix behind it. To give you an idea of how thoroughly homo this is, I spoke to a friend (who is also good with colours) the other day about it. Our conversation went:
Me: "I just bought a CD of gay Bond covers."
Friend: "Why is it gay?"
Me: "Kelly Llorenna does All Time High."
Friend: (admiringly) "Jesus Christ."
Yes, La Llorenna is on here, doing her patented too-many-Bacardi-breezers-at-the-karaoke-hen-night warbling over Rita Coolidge's "classic". For Your Eyes Only sounds like it's wearing chaps - hysterically, there's about two minutes of banging beats before it just stops for the ballady singing, before going into the house music again - and Rozalla manages to push Diamonds Are Forever so far over the edge of gayness that even Graham Norton would baulk at going there. The A View To A Kill cover begins with, and heavily emphasises, the refrain "on your body" - subtle. This is the most poofy thing to hit the world of Bond since Alan Cumming.
To be honest, it's actually way too gay for me; I don't take enough ecstasy to really appreciate its subtle nuances. Preview it on iTunes, but don't download it off there, because if you buy the CD you get a bonus "mash up" CD which is the whole lot threaded together in a big orgy of sweaty homosexual gloriousness; it's like Brighton: the Musical. And please, please buy it, because I want to hear Forever Bond 2: the idea of Kelly Llorenna forging the rock antics of Chris Cornell into a handbags in the air anthem is just too wonderful to contemplate.
PS: this album was produced by John Barry, but before you start worrying that all that business with Jane Birkin was just a front, don't panic; it's someone with the same name.
Comments
And if that recommendation doesn't make you buy it, then nothing will. I gotta buy that album now
Thanks for the heads-up, jetset.
~Pen -{
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