I just had an idea: what if Lissa was brainwashed into thinking she was a sweatshop worker, when she was actually at one time a brainwashed espionage agent for X? When Adriana saw that there was a chance Lissa could come to her senses and realize what was going on (and expose the entire operation), Adriana decided to somehow wipe her mind and sell her to be someone's private slave. This would explain her supposed background not matching her skills that seem to come out of nowhere. What do you think?
I think this is a great idea.Not only does it obviously give Lissa more depth as a character,it also helps to underscore just how insidious Obsidian really is.This certainly shows us how Mr.X and his people will stop at nothing in order to meet their goals-including "erasing" the minds of those they consider threats to their existence.We should probably see this treatment in action on a character in at least one sequence within the story itself.
Bond usually has one main love interest - will it be Daya or Lissa? I lean towards Daya myself as she has more in common with him.
We need to bear in mind that women die in Bond films (if not books). I am sensing a lot of protectiveness by the group to all of the female characters but the best drama comes from tragedy. Its important to have some major characters and some who have lesser roles. For me the female character status hierarchy is as follows:
(1) M (established character)
(2) Daya (female lead)
(3) Lissa (victim/comic relief)
(4) Adriana (villain)
But others may feel differently.
If Lissa is going to become more involved in the story (and I feel that she is too weak at the moment to do so) her back story will need to be strengthened/changed.
One thing that might be helpful is to know what the sweat shop was making because this might give her a good skill set. I think mobile phones might be one possibility (Nokia!) so she might be skilled in electronics and Q might take her under his wing. What else does Finland make a lot of?
To be honest I see her as more of a comic character. For instance when she uses Bond's car, I think she should be using the voice recognition system to direct the car because she doesnt know how to drive at all.
She provides a balance to the stronger female characters - Adriana and Daya (not to mention M) and I think the story needs someone who is vulnerable and doesnt have a lot of skills/experience. She represents all of Mister X's victims.
I'm happy to modify her in my posts as necessary. But can we use the K.I.S.S. principle as much as possible (= Keep It Simple Stupid) as over-elaborate explanations weaken stories.
I just had an idea: what if Lissa was brainwashed into thinking she was a sweatshop worker, when she was actually at one time a brainwashed espionage agent for X? When Adriana saw that there was a chance Lissa could come to her senses and realize what was going on (and expose the entire operation), Adriana decided to somehow wipe her mind and sell her to be someone's private slave. This would explain her supposed background not matching her skills that seem to come out of nowhere. What do you think?
I think this is a great idea.Not only does it obviously give Lissa more depth as a character,it also helps to underscore just how insidious Obsidian really is.This certainly shows us how Mr.X and his people will stop at nothing in order to meet their goals-including "erasing" the minds of those they consider threats to their existence.We should probably see this treatment in action on a character in at least one sequence within the story itself.
Bond usually has one main love interest - will it be Daya or Lissa? I lean towards Daya myself as she has more in common with him.
We need to bear in mind that women die in Bond films (if not books). I am sensing a lot of protectiveness by the group to all of the female characters but the best drama comes from tragedy. Its important to have some major characters and some who have lesser roles. For me the female character status hierarchy is as follows:
(1) M (established character)
(2) Daya (female lead)
(3) Lissa (victim/comic relief)
(4) Adriana (villain)
But others may feel differently.
If Lissa is going to become more involved in the story (and I feel that she is too weak at the moment to do so) her back story will need to be strengthened/changed.
One thing that might be helpful is to know what the sweat shop was making because this might give her a good skill set. I think mobile phones might be one possibility (Nokia!) so she might be skilled in electronics and Q might take her under his wing. What else does Finland make a lot of?
To be honest I see her as more of a comic character. For instance when she uses Bond's car, I think she should be using the voice recognition system to direct the car because she doesnt know how to drive at all.
She provides a balance to the stronger female characters - Adriana and Daya (not to mention M) and I think the story needs someone who is vulnerable and doesnt have a lot of skills/experience. She represents all of Mister X's victims.
I'm happy to modify her in my posts as necessary. But can we use the K.I.S.S. principle as much as possible (= Keep It Simple Stupid) as over-elaborate explanations weaken stories.
I had always assumed that Lissa would be the Bond Girl who gets killed by Obsidian's forces--possibly by Obsidian himself.
As noted,there's usually one martyred Bond Girl per film, and occasionally in the novels as well.I'd never once believed that Lissa would survive to the end of the story.Just call me bloodthirsty.:)
Here's my plan for the rest of it so if anyone has any objections please let me know ASAP:
Bond breaks into the room and notices that Lissa is unconscious on her bed. He can't revive her because he is faced with Prowess. He finally subdues Prowess, goes to Lissa and manages to revive her. Her neck is badly bruised and she can hardly talk from being strangled. Bond ties Prowess up and interrogates him. He gives away a clue that points to who Mister X is but Bond does not make the connection immediately.
Adriana breaks into the room, kills Prowess, knocks Bond out and kidnaps Lissa. Bond revives and makes the connection between the two clues. He knows where Mister X is and where Adriana has taken Lissa.
Alternatively Lissa dies at Prowess's hands and Bond fails to revive her. Adriana kills Prowess and knocks Bond out. Bond wakes up and goes after Mister X fuelled by the desire for revenge.
Let me know if you have a preference or alternative plot sequence.
I think that all three options are excellent so that makes it very difficult to select one from the others.Any one of them--in my opinion--will definitely help move the story forward.
Go with whatever you like best and I'll support you.
Ok Ive written enough I think. I have killed Lissa off and Bond has tortured Prowess and finally worked out who Mister X is.
If there are serious objections to Lissa's death she could be revived and hospitalised instead. We can maybe revisit the issue during the editing stage.
Earlier I mentioned the possibility of Adriana knocking out Bond and kidnapping Lissa but this doesnt seem necessary now.
Logically Bond should report to MI6 next which will probably end up freeing him from any suspicion as he has Prowess's DNA-absorbing gloves.
To get around this Adriana could meet Bond, seduce and knock him out and then take him to Max Obsidian. This would keep Bond incriminated and get around the logical problem of Bond not reporting in. And Bond could anticipate this and use himself as bait in order to get closer to Obsidian. Q could plant a homing device on him before Adriana picks him up. Anyway Golrush007 can take it from here.
Excellent entry, delicious. I especially like how you have established the connection between X and Obsidian. That was becoming a pesky detail which I felt was holding back the story.
I originally didn't intend Lissa to die, but it serves the story well. In a sense, I can imagine Bond feeling responsible for her death since he was the one who took her out of Baba Yaga's grasp. I vote for keeping her dead.
And for those who feel that she seemed too skilled for such an 'innocent' individual, we can still include the idea that she was once used by Baba Yaga/Adriana and Mister X for more sinister purposes but was pulled and brainwashed when she became a liability to their operation. (why didn't they just kill her, you ask? Maybe Magnus asked to keep her for himself). This would also give an ulterior purpose for Mister X wanting her dead, since there was the possibility that her secret might be exposed.
I like where the story is going so far. Mister X has failed to get Bond off the scent. Bond is angry and informed. My guess would be that his next course of action is to contact Daya and find out if she has any leads as to who shot Baker, and locate this Max Obsidian while he's with her.
I think this might be a good opportunity for Mister X, in order to remain elusive, to don a new identity.
Thanks darenhat. I want to improve the stuff about the clue that Prowess gives Bond but i haven't thought of anything yet. If I change the details it wont affect the overall plot.
Im thinking of involving Lissa more in the finding of the clue - I want her death to be as meaningful as possible in reference to her wish to help the other girls suffering in sweat shops etc. I'll set my thinking cap to "pathos" and see what comes to me.
If the group agrees with lissa's death then we should modify her interactions so that the pathos is emphasised at the end. I think she should be made more helpless and vulnerable but also full of wonder and hope.
How do others feel about her driving Bond's car using speech recognition and getting hysterical - it would be funny and heart warming I think.
Im going to modify the last scene I wrote and give Prowess an obsidian dagger which he uses when he faces Bond - it will be razor sharp like a surgical scalpel.
SlyFox can you insert somewhere in your post where Bond first meets Baba Yaga, something made from obsidian - perhaps part of the coffee service - but dont make a big deal about it. Bond will flash back to this as well as Baker's paperweigth and Prowess's knife and the name Obsidian will jump out at him from the list.
Ill dump the lame stuff in my last post about Maximilian = 'the greatest' which i wasnt very happy with.
OK Ive modified and expanded my post a bit to make it more emotional. Prowess now has an obsidian dagger and Bond sees a pattern between him, Baker and Baba Yaga who all owned something made from obsidian. I'm now done until it's my turn again.
I shall start working on my contribution this afternoon. A spell of bad weather has meant that I was unable to complete my day's work today, and so a welcome chance to work on my piece!!
Information about Obsidian - note the counties where it is mined. Possible places for our villain's lair.
Obsidian (ub-SIH-dee-in) is a natural glass that forms from volcanic activity. The gemstone is made of the same minerals as granite, but cools so quickly when exposed to air that the minerals do not have time to crystallize. Some inclusions could be bubbles or crystals, creating a random pattern such as snowflake. Obsidian is extremely rich in silica (about 35 to 80%) and is low in water. It may first have been discovered in Ethiopia by a man named Obsius, from whom its name is derived. Obsidian is fairly fragile, slightly harder than window glass. It scratches very easily and sharp blows are likely to crack it.
Obsidian has been used for tool-making since at least 21,000 B.C. and in jewelry for many centuries. American Indians used it for arrowheads, and the Aztecs used a great deal of obsidian for items including sacrificial knives and mirrors. Today, obsidian is used for dating; the stone weathers slowly at a uniform rate, and the thickness of the weathered layer is measured microscopically and gauged against known standards to give a date in years. Major sources include Iceland, Italy and the U.S.A. (especially Wyoming), plus Hawaii, Japan and Java.
I have posted my bit. It's quite short, but hopefully it keeps the ball rolling.
My idea was that Adriana, who was the woman disguised as Jenny Smart, would take the gloves and destroy the evidence that Prowess was Lissa's killer.
The police would have found the two bodies and would suspect Bond as the killer. This would further incriminate Bond, but M would send a team over to investigate Bond's flat, and find the obsidian dagger, which Bond left as a clue.
This doesn't have to be the case, it's up to you guys - feel free to go another direction if you wish.
Well, I suppose it's a bit late now, but I really wouldn't have approved of Lissa being killed off... Although it was done in a good way. Delicious, your entry really was written quite well. I'm sorry I didn't tell you this sooner... To tell you the truth, I loved Lissa's character and really didn't want to see her go. I originally saw this story as being more lighthearted than this. Although I'm probably in the minority here...
I'm not sure what you guys think about changing the car chase scene. I kind of like it the way it is, but it does create some holes in the story, I'll admit. We could go with changing her back story to one of a brainwashed ex-assassin, or we could just make her a comic relief character. However, I really don't want to reduce her existence in this story to just that of comic relief, as I thought we had Jari for that...
By the way, I really like your entry, Golrush. It seems MI6 has more moles lurking about than we thought...
Well done, Golrush...it looks as if Mister X and Adriana have had their fill of Bond and are going to take care of him once and for all. Perhaps Adriana is taking Bond to their proposed brainwashing facility?
And in response to Sly Fox's comment about more MI6 moles...I don't think that's necessary since any of the information that Adriana used to pose as Miss Smart could easily have originally come from Carter when he was with MI6.
I'd like to see Scaramanga1's art collecter angle followed up on, since it does explain what Mister X is doing with the money that he's stealing. Art, deathmasks, and other curios like the obsidian dagger seem to be his hobby.
And in response to Sly Fox's comment about more MI6 moles...I don't think that's necessary since any of the information that Adriana used to pose as Miss Smart could easily have originally come from Carter when he was with MI6.
Yes - that's how I thought of it. The persona would have been created based on information gathered by Carter or Prowess. And perhaps Adriana rubbed out the real Miss Smart. . .
Well, I suppose it's a bit late now, but I really wouldn't have approved of Lissa being killed off... Although it was done in a good way. Delicious, your entry really was written quite well. I'm sorry I didn't tell you this sooner... To tell you the truth, I loved Lissa's character and really didn't want to see her go. I originally saw this story as being more lighthearted than this. Although I'm probably in the minority here...
I'm not sure what you guys think about changing the car chase scene. I kind of like it the way it is, but it does create some holes in the story, I'll admit. We could go with changing her back story to one of a brainwashed ex-assassin, or we could just make her a comic relief character. However, I really don't want to reduce her existence in this story to just that of comic relief, as I thought we had Jari for that...
By the way, I really like your entry, Golrush. It seems MI6 has more moles lurking about than we thought...
Sorry SlyFox I did post it as a question for feedback but eventually had to press on.
And it's not set in concrete - nothing is yet - Lissa can always be revived and hospitalised instead of being killed off. it wont affect the plot and if she's dying on the bed while Bond is grapplign with prowess that's good drama too. So let's make it a definite maybe for the moment.
I dont see Lissa as totally comic relief but her roles are lover, victim, heart-warming comic relief. We fear for her, we find her sensous and she delights us. Others may have other qualities to add to the list.
Thanks Delicious, I would definitely prefer such an ending for Lissa. Although we don't have to do anything with it at the moment, as that can be done during editing. I like the idea of her dying on the bed, perhaps going unconscious. After disposing of Prowess, Bond would think Lissa was dead, so he would leave her there. This way, we don't have to modify the current scene at all. Really however, it would turn out that she ends up in hospital, yet Bond (or the reader) doesn't find out until the end of the story. She'd have sort of a cameo appearance after the climax. This still leaves Daya as Bond's primary lover, and we could see Bond giving Lissa another ecstatic kiss in the hospital room...
Sorry I may have sounded a bit uptight last night... Perhaps light-duty comic relief isn't such a bad idea. It's just when I hear the words "comic relief" I tend to think of C-3PO and R2D2... As for the car chase scene, I'll look into making it a bit less like a Bruce Willis action scene and more like an "AAAHHH, what do I do!??" comic scene. I'll also add a bit of Obsidian glassworks into the first scene with Baba Yaga. I'll have to look into your tips about obsidian (the material), Delicious.
As for the next scene, I like the idea of Miss Smart really being Adriana in disguise. I could write that Bond wakes up in an obscure torture chamber with Adriana in charge. She does seem to be into that sort of thing, after all... Perhaps this is her chance to get to know Bond a bit better? I'll wait to start it until I get some feedback. I can either kill off Adriana or let her barely escape Bond's wrath with plenty of scrapes and bruises to show for it. Since killing off characters is obviously a very touchy subject, I'll wait for feedback first. Just a thought, but she may be good for another scene toward the end, and it may give us an excuse to make Obsidian even angrier...
By the way, I agree that we don't need any more MI6 moles. Adriana in disguise has already filled that role.
Thanks Delicious, I would definitely prefer such an ending for Lissa. Although we don't have to do anything with it at the moment, as that can be done during editing. I like the idea of her dying on the bed, perhaps going unconscious. After disposing of Prowess, Bond would think Lissa was dead, so he would leave her there. This way, we don't have to modify the current scene at all. Really however, it would turn out that she ends up in hospital, yet Bond (or the reader) doesn't find out until the end of the story. She'd have sort of a cameo appearance after the climax. This still leaves Daya as Bond's primary lover, and we could see Bond giving Lissa another ecstatic kiss in the hospital room...
Sorry I may have sounded a bit uptight last night... Perhaps light-duty comic relief isn't such a bad idea. It's just when I hear the words "comic relief" I tend to think of C-3PO and R2D2... As for the car chase scene, I'll look into making it a bit less like a Bruce Willis action scene and more like an "AAAHHH, what do I do!??" comic scene. I'll also add a bit of Obsidian glassworks into the first scene with Baba Yaga. I'll have to look into your tips about obsidian (the material), Delicious.
As for the next scene, I like the idea of Miss Smart really being Adriana in disguise. I could write that Bond wakes up in an obscure torture chamber with Adriana in charge. She does seem to be into that sort of thing, after all... Perhaps this is her chance to get to know Bond a bit better? I'll wait to start it until I get some feedback. I can either kill off Adriana or let her barely escape Bond's wrath with plenty of scrapes and bruises to show for it. Since killing off characters is obviously a very touchy subject, I'll wait for feedback first. Just a thought, but she may be good for another scene toward the end, and it may give us an excuse to make Obsidian even angrier...
By the way, I agree that we don't need any more MI6 moles. Adriana in disguise has already filled that role.
1. I think Bond just reviving Lissa and her being hospitalised is as complex as it needs to get.
2. Adriana strikes me as a character who would die at the end of the novel if at all - much like Onotop in GE or Miranda Frost in DAD.
3. If Bond gets captured and flown out of th country before he can report to MI6 this will make his look like Lissa's murderer.
The scenario where Lissa is still alive but hospitalized, and she is in fact a former operative of Obsidian's who is now brainwashed, could add an interesting element to the story. MI6 could find some way to tap into her unconsciousness to extract information, which kind of parallels Obsidian's searchings of his own psyche.
1. I think Bond just reviving Lissa and her being hospitalised is as complex as it needs to get.
2. Adriana strikes me as a character who would die at the end of the novel if at all - much like Onotop in GE or Miranda Frost in DAD.
3. If Bond gets captured and flown out of th country before he can report to MI6 this will make his look like Lissa's murderer.
What do others think on these points?
These all sound good to me, I'll try to incorporate them into my bit. Adriana won't suffer an early death. As for point #3, if you would prefer, we can just make it where Bond revives Lissa and gets her to hospital. (By the way, you have a great idea, Daren--it would open up a whole new set of possibilities). This way, we can deal with her later in the novel if we so desire, but it's not required. In this case, Golrush's entry will need to be modified slightly (if he doesn't mind ). If this is what you would like to do, should we just assume it now and write accordingly, or should we still assume she's dead? The longer we wait to decide, the more we have to go back and fix later... Just a thought.
I realize keeping her alive was my idea and I do apologize if it's created an inconvenience for everyone. Whichever scenario we happen to choose, I'll get to work on my bit right now.
1. I think Bond just reviving Lissa and her being hospitalised is as complex as it needs to get.
2. Adriana strikes me as a character who would die at the end of the novel if at all - much like Onotop in GE or Miranda Frost in DAD.
3. If Bond gets captured and flown out of th country before he can report to MI6 this will make his look like Lissa's murderer.
What do others think on these points?
These all sound good to me, I'll try to incorporate them into my bit. Adriana won't suffer an early death. As for point #3, if you would prefer, we can just make it where Bond revives Lissa and gets her to hospital. (By the way, you have a great idea, Daren--it would open up a whole new set of possibilities). This way, we can deal with her later in the novel if we so desire, but it's not required. In this case, Golrush's entry will need to be modified slightly (if he doesn't mind ). If this is what you would like to do, should we just assume it now and write accordingly, or should we still assume she's dead? The longer we wait to decide, the more we have to go back and fix later... Just a thought.
I realize keeping her alive was my idea and I do apologize if it's created an inconvenience for everyone. Whichever scenario we happen to choose, I'll get to work on my bit right now.
Im sorry if I sound like a nay-sayer but Lissa's death works for me. Making her an ex-agent feels too complex, roundabout and far-fetched to me. I'd rather see some new characters being created for these roles rather than further complicating hers.
Mister X's plan was to discredit Bond by making him look like Lissa's murderer. He doesnt realise that the gloves he took off Prowess will eventually vindicate him but if Adriana is going to try to keep Mister X's plan going she has to get Bond to leave the country so that he looks guilty. I think she should seduce and kidnap him and then when he wakes up in India or wherever, he would escape and be pursued by both Mister X's people and MI6 agents and really have his back to the wall - the good guys and bad guys all chasing him.
Having said that: "que sera sera, whatever will be will be..."
I'm fine either way with Lissa's survival or death...each holds possibilities in my mind. I will say that I'd rather keep her alive then kill her off and introduce a new character. The general rule of thumb that I learned is to try not to have more than seven characters in a story. After that, the reader/audience tends to 'lose track' of them. I feel we have plenty of characters to work with (and that's not including the 'stock' characters like M, Tanner, Q and Moneypenny).
I dont like the idea of Lissa being an ex-agent but if she were to survive, she might be useful as a way to track down Mister X if Bond reaches another dead end in India after escaping from Adriana etc.
MI6 could use hypnosis (which is becoming a bit of a theme in this novel) to extract detailed memories from Lissa from when Mister X visited Baba Yaga in Finland - or if not by hypnosis maybe Lissa just gets questioned in detail about her time in the sweatshop and knows something that could help find Mister X.
Sounds like a great idea, delicious. I think that's an excellent compromise. If everyone's okay with it, I'll try to set up my bit so that we can the ball rolling on MI6's forensic hypnosis. I know it is a technique used by actual investigators to help witnesses remember what they've seen. I saw it on the Discovery Channel...
I've also made some proposed edits to your last entry to match this change in the story. They're just below this post. Let me know if you like it. Although don't feel obligated to use it as is, feel free to edit as you see fit.
I don't think I will do this with Golrush's entry, as it's just the first two paragraphs which will need editing if we go with such a story change. I'm not sure what Golrush would want in them, so I think I'll just leave that to him.
By the way, I've made it so that Bond sees a statue of a knight on horseback on Baba Yaga's mantle.
These are the edits I propose to delicious's last entry.
Bond found entertaining Lissa an utterly delightful experience. Almost everything in London was new to her, from shopping for the beautiful dress that she now wore to exploring the amenities of a top hotel to eating at a high class restaurant in the West End. Bond found himself making mental lists of all the things that he would introduce her to just to see the delight and wonder in her face. He could not believe that she had never even had Indian food before. Tomorrow night he would take her to the Opera. She was a tangible example of the malignant influence that evil men like Mister X had upon the world. Her plight strengthened his resolve to find the monster and stop him.
Lissa lifted a spoonful of curry to her mouth and tasted it. She looked across the table at Bond who watched with genial amusement.
"What do you think?"
"It’s delicious."
"Not bad, is it? The chef used to work for MI6 in India in a kind of unofficial capacity. But his first love has always been cooking."
"I can cook too."
"Finnish cooking?"
"Of course."
"Pickled herring on black bread?"
Lissa sighed.
"No. But it’s true. A lot of Finnish food comes from other countries. Pickled herring is Dutch and black bread is Russian."
"So what can you cook?"
"I like Karelian food. Beef hot pots, potato pasties. Good winter food."
"Wouldn’t be very popular in India."
Lissa smiled.
"No I suppose not."
Bond raised his glass for a toast and Lissa did likewise.
"To good food everywhere."
They drank. As Bond put his glass down he noticed a figure standing in the street below. He took out his mobile phone and glanced apologetically at Lissa.
"Forgive me but I have to check my messages."
He quickly sent an SMS to MI6: Am under surveillance. Regent Street. Advise if M authorised. Bond.
As he waited for a reply the waiter came and set some new dishes in front of them. A few minutes later came back the reply: No surveillance authorised. It’s not one of ours. Take care James. Moneypenny.
Bond snapped his phone shut. Lissa glanced at it.
"May I see?"
Bond handed it to her.
"I used to make mobile phones in the sweat shop."
"Now that you’re a free woman what are you going to do with yourself?"
"I don’t know yet. I hate to think of all the other girls who are still being exploited. I’d like to help them somewhow. But I don’t know how."
Bond raised his glass again.
"To your future career, whatever it may be."
They drank. Bond surveyed the empty platters and looked at Lissa.
"Would you like anything else."
"Oh no thank you. I’m full."
"Well how about coffee? I know a place just down the road."
"Sounds great."
Bond paid the bill and they walked down the stairs and into the warm London evening. As they sauntered along regent Street, Bond used the reflections in the windows on the other side of the road to see if they were still being followed. They were.
He and Lissa had coffee at a small café called Bar Humbug. The walls were covered in photographs of famous frauds and killjoys from history like Queen Victoria, Richard Nixon, Jerry Falwell and the Reverend Lyman Beecher, an advocate of prohibition in the twenties. It was not the kind of place that Bond would normally have frequented but he wanted to see what their tail would do. Sure enough, he was at another café on the other side of the street. From where he sat Bond could not see his face.
After coffee they returned to Bond’s car and he drove Lissa back to her hotel. On the way Bond noticed that he was now being tailed by a car. He escorted Lissa to her door and stood with hands in pockets as she unlocked her door.
"Would you like to come in?"
Bond looked ruefully at her.
"I’d love to. But I can’t tonight. I’ll call you tomorrow."
Lissa looked disappointed. Bond suddenly took her in his arms and kissed her. When he drew back Lissa was almost unconscious, lost in the ecstasy. She opened her eyes and looked longingly at him.
"Are you sure you can’t stay?"
Bond nodded regretfully.
"I’m afraid not."
"James. Before you go, I’ve got something for you."
She disappeared into the room and came back holding a small gift-wrapped box about the size of a cigarette box.
Bond opened it and took out a flat silver spirits flask. It was beautifully made and was obviously an antique. Bond opened it and sniffed.
"What’s in it?"
"Vodka."
He laughed.
"What’s the occasion?"
"I know its not my money but I wanted to buy you something to thank you for everything you’ve done for me. I saw it in a shop down in the arcade and it made me think of you. I’ll never forget that night we spent in the cabin drinking vodka from the same glass and trying to keep warm."
Bond examined it more closely.
"It’s not a hip flask, they’re curved."
"No it’s a heart flask. Soldiers put them in their shirt pockets during the war to protect their hearts from bullets."
She took it and tucked it carefully into his shirt pocket.
"There you go - now you’re heart is safe."
Bond was touched but he could find no words. They looked at each other for a long moment and then he managed to break the silence.
"Thank you. Good night and sweet dreams."
She smiled wistfully at him and backed into the room. He waited until her door had closed and locked and then returned to his car. As he drove off he passed the car that had been tailing him. In his rear view mirror he saw a figure get out and enter the hotel lobby. Bond cursed. The man wasn’t after him, he was after Lissa. He stopped his car in the middle of the street, jumped out despite the honking of the cars behind him and ran back into the hotel. He skidded to a stop at the lifts, startling several people who were standing waiting for it. As he waited he thought of using the stairs but Lissa’s room was on the 10th floor so they would be no quicker and he didn’t want to be out of breath for what might follow. The lift finally arrived. He leapt in ahead of the others and drew his gun causing them to step back in fear. He punched 10 and Close Doors. The lift took him smoothly up to the 10th floor. When the doors opened he peered out. Lissa’s door was closed which meant that whoever it was was either very charming or very good with locks.
He ran quietly to her door, knocked and spoke with a heavy Cockney accent.
"Room service. Your dry cleaning is ready."
There was a pause and then someone could be heard coming over to the door. As soon as it began to open Bond shoulder charged it with all his might knocking the figure on the other side backwards onto the carpet. As soon as he entered the room Bond registered three things very quickly. First, Lissa was lying on the bed with her eyes open but not moving. Second, the man on the floor was in fact Special Agent Jack Prowess. Third, Prowess had taken out a knife and was about to throw it. Bond fired as the knife left Prowess’s hand. The bullet hit Prowess in the right shoulder. The knife hit Bond in the chest but fell harmlessly to the floor. Somewhat surprised, Prowess reached inside his jacket with his other hand but Bond fired again hitting him in the left forearm. Prowess screamed and fell back, both arms now useless. Bond stepped forward and kicked him viciously in the head knocking him out cold.
*******EDITS HAVE BEEN MADE BELOW THIS POINT******
Bond leapt over to the bed and felt Lissa’s heart. There was no pulse that he could detect. Her neck was badly bruised - she had been strangled. Desperately he started resuscitation, pushing on her sternum for five counts and then breathing into her mouth for one. After a few attempts, her back convulsed and she coughed up a small amount of blood. She weakly opened her eyes. Bond breathed a sigh of relief. He leaned in and gently lifted her head, cradling the back of her neck.
"Are you alright?" Bond asked softly.
Lissa tried to speak, but had difficulty doing so. It seemed her vocal cords had been damaged.
"Do you think you can make it?" Bond asked worriedly.
Lissa responded slowly. "I..." She weakly reached her arm up and lovingly touched the side of Bond's face. Slowly, she lowered her arm back to the bed and rested her head in Bond's hand. Bond quickly checked her pulse--she had gone unconscious, yet she was still alive.
He gave a great groan of frustration. It didn’t make any sense. Why would anyone want to kill her? She didn’t know anything, she was no threat to anyone. After everything he had done to try and get her away from the monsters who had been using her since she was a child, she had just come inches between falling prey to them.
"Rest, my dear." He pulled a pillow over to her and laid her head in it. Angry, he walked over to the unconscious Prowess, hauled him roughly onto a chair and tied him to it with his own necktie. Then he searched him and divested him of a number of CIA gadgets. He noticed that Prowess was wearing the same white gloves he had been wearing when they first met at the airport. They no doubt contained DNA that would identify Prowess as Lissa’s attempted murderer. Bond pulled them off, turned them inside out and pocketed them.
*******EDITS HAVE BEEN MADE ABOVE THIS POINT*******
He went into the room’s ensuite and got a glass of water. He took a sip and then threw the rest in Prowess’s face. The other man stirred slightly. Bond backhanded Prowess savagely across the face and he started awake. Bond tapped his wounded right shoulder with the butt of his gun. Prowess grimaced in pain.
"Now that I have your full attention, I want some answers."
Prowess said nothing.
"Why Lissa?"
Prowess just stared at him. Bond tapped his left forearm. Prowess’s face was a rictus of agony but he remained silent. In spite of himself Bond had to admire the man’s self control. Prowess was bleeding heavily from his wounds so Bond had to get some answers fast.
"Either you start talking or I will call room service and order some tequila."
Prowess looked at him in surprise.
"So?"
"As I’m sure you are aware, tequila is served with two things - salt and lemon. Do you know what happens if you add either of these substances to an open wound?"
"I can’t tell you anything. If I do I’m a dead man."
"You think I won’t kill you? Think again. You’re a dead man either way. So why not do the right thing before you meet your Maker?"
Prowess stared into space for a moment. His face was becoming pale from blood loss.
"You’ll never find him. He’s too smart. He’s been playing MI6 for years. Playing you all like fools."
"Mister X?"
Prowess nodded.
"You admire him, don’t you?"
"He’s made me a very rich man."
"The money’s not much good to you dead though, is it?"
Prowess said nothing.
"Listen to me Prowess. Mister X, whoever he is, is a user. That’s what he does. He’s not interested in toppling governments or destroying the world. He likes the system just the way it is because he can manipulate it to do anything he wants. He’s used you and here you are, about to die."
Prowess glared impotent hatred at him. Bond picked up the room’s telephone and dialed room service.
"Yes, this is Mr Prowess in Room 1013. Can you please send up a bottle of tequila with plenty of salt and lemon? Thank you."
He replaced the receiver and looked at Prowess.
"And now we wait. But not for long - I believe the service in this hotel is excellent."
Prowess was weakening quickly. His breathing was shallow and uneven. Bond suddenly realised that he was manipulating his own breathing pattern to induce death as quickly as possible. Suddenly Prowess went rigid and then collapsed, his head lolling to one side, his eyes glassy and unseeing. He was dead.
*******EDITS HAVE BEEN MADE BELOW THIS POINT*******
Bond cursed his own stupidity for not spotting what Prowess was doing. He looked around the room and felt a sudden chill from all the recent violence that had happened, but felt a certain warmth when he saw Lissa on the bed, her chest rhythmically moving up and down as she was breathing. After looking around the room, he noticed Prowess’s knife lying on the floor near the door and picked it up. It was extremely heavy and at first Bond thought that it was made from iron but then realised that it was actually made from heavy black glass. More obsidian, he thought. It was double edged and razor sharp and would have killed him if it had penetrated his chest. He took out the heart flask that Lissa had given him.
Bond knew he had saved her life, yet he still felt that he had failed to protect her. It was a miracle she was still alive. Think, he berated himself. What do you now know that you didn’t before? An idea suddenly occurred to him. He opened his phone and scanned the list of names from the files that had been tampered with on his computer. Suddenly his eyes were drawn to one name in particular. Maximilian Obsidian. Prowess had an obsidian knife. Baker had been talking about obsidian just before he was killed. And he had seen some obsidian even earlier. At the Mortar and Pestle. The statue on Baba Yaga's mantle had been made from it. It had to be more than coincidence.
Bond looked at the heart flask that Lissa had given him. He tucked it away in his coat pocket and dialed a three-digit number on his phone.
"007. It's about Vasilissa. She's been badly injured. Crowne Plaza London St. James, Room Six-hundred and Ninety, send an ambulance immediately..." He went to hang up, then said to the operator, "You'll also find Mr. Prowess here. It seems we've found our mole." He hung up the phone and put it in the pocket of his slacks. He walked toward the door and turned around.
"I know who he is Lissa. And I'm going to stop him hurting girls like you. Just like you wanted."
There is a plot development problem here. If Lissa is revived by Bond, his first concern would be getting her medical attention before he tried to interrogate Prowess. I think he would contact MI6 and get them to look after her (like Scylla in The Marathon Man who goes and gets his injuries attended to at The Division (=MI6).
But if Bond contacts MI6 to say that Lissa needs medical help then Mister X's plot to set him up for her death is already foiled. Prowess would be interrogated by Bond after Bond had contacted MI6 requesting assistance for Lissa. The idea that Bond gets spirited away by Adriana to make him look like the murderer becomes unuseable.
Well, it wouldn't necessarily be unusable, since X still doesn't know that his plot has been foiled. As far as he knows, it's still going as planned. Unless he's watching as the authorities go into the hotel (which doesn't make sense, since he was confident enough to send Prowess to do the job--I honestly don't see him having a backup plan. Some might disagree, however). What I was writing was a torture scene between Bond and Adriana, in which Obsidian happens to be present: that is when Bond informs him that his plot has failed. Obsidian goes ballistic and we get to see the angry side of him. Bond then has to escape from Adriana who's about to kill him. Does this seem good, or does it not work very well?
Just a note:
Lissa can always be revived and hospitalised instead of being killed off. it wont affect the plot and if she's dying on the bed while Bond is grappling with prowess that's good drama too.
Perhaps we could incorporate it into the story that she lays dying on the bed while fighting off Prowess. Perhaps this would work?
Comments
Bond usually has one main love interest - will it be Daya or Lissa? I lean towards Daya myself as she has more in common with him.
We need to bear in mind that women die in Bond films (if not books). I am sensing a lot of protectiveness by the group to all of the female characters but the best drama comes from tragedy. Its important to have some major characters and some who have lesser roles. For me the female character status hierarchy is as follows:
(1) M (established character)
(2) Daya (female lead)
(3) Lissa (victim/comic relief)
(4) Adriana (villain)
But others may feel differently.
If Lissa is going to become more involved in the story (and I feel that she is too weak at the moment to do so) her back story will need to be strengthened/changed.
One thing that might be helpful is to know what the sweat shop was making because this might give her a good skill set. I think mobile phones might be one possibility (Nokia!) so she might be skilled in electronics and Q might take her under his wing. What else does Finland make a lot of?
To be honest I see her as more of a comic character. For instance when she uses Bond's car, I think she should be using the voice recognition system to direct the car because she doesnt know how to drive at all.
She provides a balance to the stronger female characters - Adriana and Daya (not to mention M) and I think the story needs someone who is vulnerable and doesnt have a lot of skills/experience. She represents all of Mister X's victims.
I'm happy to modify her in my posts as necessary. But can we use the K.I.S.S. principle as much as possible (= Keep It Simple Stupid) as over-elaborate explanations weaken stories.
I had always assumed that Lissa would be the Bond Girl who gets killed by Obsidian's forces--possibly by Obsidian himself.
As noted,there's usually one martyred Bond Girl per film, and occasionally in the novels as well.I'd never once believed that Lissa would survive to the end of the story.Just call me bloodthirsty.:)
And I also think Jari's days are numbered,too...
Here's my plan for the rest of it so if anyone has any objections please let me know ASAP:
Bond breaks into the room and notices that Lissa is unconscious on her bed. He can't revive her because he is faced with Prowess. He finally subdues Prowess, goes to Lissa and manages to revive her. Her neck is badly bruised and she can hardly talk from being strangled. Bond ties Prowess up and interrogates him. He gives away a clue that points to who Mister X is but Bond does not make the connection immediately.
Adriana breaks into the room, kills Prowess, knocks Bond out and kidnaps Lissa. Bond revives and makes the connection between the two clues. He knows where Mister X is and where Adriana has taken Lissa.
Alternatively Lissa dies at Prowess's hands and Bond fails to revive her. Adriana kills Prowess and knocks Bond out. Bond wakes up and goes after Mister X fuelled by the desire for revenge.
Let me know if you have a preference or alternative plot sequence.
Go with whatever you like best and I'll support you.
If there are serious objections to Lissa's death she could be revived and hospitalised instead. We can maybe revisit the issue during the editing stage.
Earlier I mentioned the possibility of Adriana knocking out Bond and kidnapping Lissa but this doesnt seem necessary now.
Logically Bond should report to MI6 next which will probably end up freeing him from any suspicion as he has Prowess's DNA-absorbing gloves.
To get around this Adriana could meet Bond, seduce and knock him out and then take him to Max Obsidian. This would keep Bond incriminated and get around the logical problem of Bond not reporting in. And Bond could anticipate this and use himself as bait in order to get closer to Obsidian. Q could plant a homing device on him before Adriana picks him up. Anyway Golrush007 can take it from here.
I originally didn't intend Lissa to die, but it serves the story well. In a sense, I can imagine Bond feeling responsible for her death since he was the one who took her out of Baba Yaga's grasp. I vote for keeping her dead.
And for those who feel that she seemed too skilled for such an 'innocent' individual, we can still include the idea that she was once used by Baba Yaga/Adriana and Mister X for more sinister purposes but was pulled and brainwashed when she became a liability to their operation. (why didn't they just kill her, you ask? Maybe Magnus asked to keep her for himself). This would also give an ulterior purpose for Mister X wanting her dead, since there was the possibility that her secret might be exposed.
I like where the story is going so far. Mister X has failed to get Bond off the scent. Bond is angry and informed. My guess would be that his next course of action is to contact Daya and find out if she has any leads as to who shot Baker, and locate this Max Obsidian while he's with her.
I think this might be a good opportunity for Mister X, in order to remain elusive, to don a new identity.
Im thinking of involving Lissa more in the finding of the clue - I want her death to be as meaningful as possible in reference to her wish to help the other girls suffering in sweat shops etc. I'll set my thinking cap to "pathos" and see what comes to me.
If the group agrees with lissa's death then we should modify her interactions so that the pathos is emphasised at the end. I think she should be made more helpless and vulnerable but also full of wonder and hope.
How do others feel about her driving Bond's car using speech recognition and getting hysterical - it would be funny and heart warming I think.
SlyFox can you insert somewhere in your post where Bond first meets Baba Yaga, something made from obsidian - perhaps part of the coffee service - but dont make a big deal about it. Bond will flash back to this as well as Baker's paperweigth and Prowess's knife and the name Obsidian will jump out at him from the list.
Ill dump the lame stuff in my last post about Maximilian = 'the greatest' which i wasnt very happy with.
Obsidian (ub-SIH-dee-in) is a natural glass that forms from volcanic activity. The gemstone is made of the same minerals as granite, but cools so quickly when exposed to air that the minerals do not have time to crystallize. Some inclusions could be bubbles or crystals, creating a random pattern such as snowflake. Obsidian is extremely rich in silica (about 35 to 80%) and is low in water. It may first have been discovered in Ethiopia by a man named Obsius, from whom its name is derived. Obsidian is fairly fragile, slightly harder than window glass. It scratches very easily and sharp blows are likely to crack it.
Obsidian has been used for tool-making since at least 21,000 B.C. and in jewelry for many centuries. American Indians used it for arrowheads, and the Aztecs used a great deal of obsidian for items including sacrificial knives and mirrors. Today, obsidian is used for dating; the stone weathers slowly at a uniform rate, and the thickness of the weathered layer is measured microscopically and gauged against known standards to give a date in years. Major sources include Iceland, Italy and the U.S.A. (especially Wyoming), plus Hawaii, Japan and Java.
My idea was that Adriana, who was the woman disguised as Jenny Smart, would take the gloves and destroy the evidence that Prowess was Lissa's killer.
The police would have found the two bodies and would suspect Bond as the killer. This would further incriminate Bond, but M would send a team over to investigate Bond's flat, and find the obsidian dagger, which Bond left as a clue.
This doesn't have to be the case, it's up to you guys - feel free to go another direction if you wish.
I'm not sure what you guys think about changing the car chase scene. I kind of like it the way it is, but it does create some holes in the story, I'll admit. We could go with changing her back story to one of a brainwashed ex-assassin, or we could just make her a comic relief character. However, I really don't want to reduce her existence in this story to just that of comic relief, as I thought we had Jari for that...
By the way, I really like your entry, Golrush. It seems MI6 has more moles lurking about than we thought...
Also, I have tweaked one or two things in my post, but nothing drastic.
And in response to Sly Fox's comment about more MI6 moles...I don't think that's necessary since any of the information that Adriana used to pose as Miss Smart could easily have originally come from Carter when he was with MI6.
I'd like to see Scaramanga1's art collecter angle followed up on, since it does explain what Mister X is doing with the money that he's stealing. Art, deathmasks, and other curios like the obsidian dagger seem to be his hobby.
Yes - that's how I thought of it. The persona would have been created based on information gathered by Carter or Prowess. And perhaps Adriana rubbed out the real Miss Smart. . .
Sorry SlyFox I did post it as a question for feedback but eventually had to press on.
And it's not set in concrete - nothing is yet - Lissa can always be revived and hospitalised instead of being killed off. it wont affect the plot and if she's dying on the bed while Bond is grapplign with prowess that's good drama too. So let's make it a definite maybe for the moment.
I dont see Lissa as totally comic relief but her roles are lover, victim, heart-warming comic relief. We fear for her, we find her sensous and she delights us. Others may have other qualities to add to the list.
Sorry I may have sounded a bit uptight last night... Perhaps light-duty comic relief isn't such a bad idea. It's just when I hear the words "comic relief" I tend to think of C-3PO and R2D2...
As for the next scene, I like the idea of Miss Smart really being Adriana in disguise. I could write that Bond wakes up in an obscure torture chamber with Adriana in charge. She does seem to be into that sort of thing, after all... Perhaps this is her chance to get to know Bond a bit better?
By the way, I agree that we don't need any more MI6 moles. Adriana in disguise has already filled that role.
1. I think Bond just reviving Lissa and her being hospitalised is as complex as it needs to get.
2. Adriana strikes me as a character who would die at the end of the novel if at all - much like Onotop in GE or Miranda Frost in DAD.
3. If Bond gets captured and flown out of th country before he can report to MI6 this will make his look like Lissa's murderer.
What do others think on these points?
Just a thought.
These all sound good to me, I'll try to incorporate them into my bit. Adriana won't suffer an early death.
I realize keeping her alive was my idea and I do apologize if it's created an inconvenience for everyone. Whichever scenario we happen to choose, I'll get to work on my bit right now.
Im sorry if I sound like a nay-sayer but Lissa's death works for me. Making her an ex-agent feels too complex, roundabout and far-fetched to me. I'd rather see some new characters being created for these roles rather than further complicating hers.
Mister X's plan was to discredit Bond by making him look like Lissa's murderer. He doesnt realise that the gloves he took off Prowess will eventually vindicate him but if Adriana is going to try to keep Mister X's plan going she has to get Bond to leave the country so that he looks guilty. I think she should seduce and kidnap him and then when he wakes up in India or wherever, he would escape and be pursued by both Mister X's people and MI6 agents and really have his back to the wall - the good guys and bad guys all chasing him.
Having said that: "que sera sera, whatever will be will be..."
MI6 could use hypnosis (which is becoming a bit of a theme in this novel) to extract detailed memories from Lissa from when Mister X visited Baba Yaga in Finland - or if not by hypnosis maybe Lissa just gets questioned in detail about her time in the sweatshop and knows something that could help find Mister X.
I've also made some proposed edits to your last entry to match this change in the story. They're just below this post. Let me know if you like it. Although don't feel obligated to use it as is, feel free to edit as you see fit.
I don't think I will do this with Golrush's entry, as it's just the first two paragraphs which will need editing if we go with such a story change. I'm not sure what Golrush would want in them, so I think I'll just leave that to him.
By the way, I've made it so that Bond sees a statue of a knight on horseback on Baba Yaga's mantle.
Bond found entertaining Lissa an utterly delightful experience. Almost everything in London was new to her, from shopping for the beautiful dress that she now wore to exploring the amenities of a top hotel to eating at a high class restaurant in the West End. Bond found himself making mental lists of all the things that he would introduce her to just to see the delight and wonder in her face. He could not believe that she had never even had Indian food before. Tomorrow night he would take her to the Opera. She was a tangible example of the malignant influence that evil men like Mister X had upon the world. Her plight strengthened his resolve to find the monster and stop him.
Lissa lifted a spoonful of curry to her mouth and tasted it. She looked across the table at Bond who watched with genial amusement.
"What do you think?"
"It’s delicious."
"Not bad, is it? The chef used to work for MI6 in India in a kind of unofficial capacity. But his first love has always been cooking."
"I can cook too."
"Finnish cooking?"
"Of course."
"Pickled herring on black bread?"
Lissa sighed.
"No. But it’s true. A lot of Finnish food comes from other countries. Pickled herring is Dutch and black bread is Russian."
"So what can you cook?"
"I like Karelian food. Beef hot pots, potato pasties. Good winter food."
"Wouldn’t be very popular in India."
Lissa smiled.
"No I suppose not."
Bond raised his glass for a toast and Lissa did likewise.
"To good food everywhere."
They drank. As Bond put his glass down he noticed a figure standing in the street below. He took out his mobile phone and glanced apologetically at Lissa.
"Forgive me but I have to check my messages."
He quickly sent an SMS to MI6: Am under surveillance. Regent Street. Advise if M authorised. Bond.
As he waited for a reply the waiter came and set some new dishes in front of them. A few minutes later came back the reply: No surveillance authorised. It’s not one of ours. Take care James. Moneypenny.
Bond snapped his phone shut. Lissa glanced at it.
"May I see?"
Bond handed it to her.
"I used to make mobile phones in the sweat shop."
"Now that you’re a free woman what are you going to do with yourself?"
"I don’t know yet. I hate to think of all the other girls who are still being exploited. I’d like to help them somewhow. But I don’t know how."
Bond raised his glass again.
"To your future career, whatever it may be."
They drank. Bond surveyed the empty platters and looked at Lissa.
"Would you like anything else."
"Oh no thank you. I’m full."
"Well how about coffee? I know a place just down the road."
"Sounds great."
Bond paid the bill and they walked down the stairs and into the warm London evening. As they sauntered along regent Street, Bond used the reflections in the windows on the other side of the road to see if they were still being followed. They were.
He and Lissa had coffee at a small café called Bar Humbug. The walls were covered in photographs of famous frauds and killjoys from history like Queen Victoria, Richard Nixon, Jerry Falwell and the Reverend Lyman Beecher, an advocate of prohibition in the twenties. It was not the kind of place that Bond would normally have frequented but he wanted to see what their tail would do. Sure enough, he was at another café on the other side of the street. From where he sat Bond could not see his face.
After coffee they returned to Bond’s car and he drove Lissa back to her hotel. On the way Bond noticed that he was now being tailed by a car. He escorted Lissa to her door and stood with hands in pockets as she unlocked her door.
"Would you like to come in?"
Bond looked ruefully at her.
"I’d love to. But I can’t tonight. I’ll call you tomorrow."
Lissa looked disappointed. Bond suddenly took her in his arms and kissed her. When he drew back Lissa was almost unconscious, lost in the ecstasy. She opened her eyes and looked longingly at him.
"Are you sure you can’t stay?"
Bond nodded regretfully.
"I’m afraid not."
"James. Before you go, I’ve got something for you."
She disappeared into the room and came back holding a small gift-wrapped box about the size of a cigarette box.
Bond opened it and took out a flat silver spirits flask. It was beautifully made and was obviously an antique. Bond opened it and sniffed.
"What’s in it?"
"Vodka."
He laughed.
"What’s the occasion?"
"I know its not my money but I wanted to buy you something to thank you for everything you’ve done for me. I saw it in a shop down in the arcade and it made me think of you. I’ll never forget that night we spent in the cabin drinking vodka from the same glass and trying to keep warm."
Bond examined it more closely.
"It’s not a hip flask, they’re curved."
"No it’s a heart flask. Soldiers put them in their shirt pockets during the war to protect their hearts from bullets."
She took it and tucked it carefully into his shirt pocket.
"There you go - now you’re heart is safe."
Bond was touched but he could find no words. They looked at each other for a long moment and then he managed to break the silence.
"Thank you. Good night and sweet dreams."
She smiled wistfully at him and backed into the room. He waited until her door had closed and locked and then returned to his car. As he drove off he passed the car that had been tailing him. In his rear view mirror he saw a figure get out and enter the hotel lobby. Bond cursed. The man wasn’t after him, he was after Lissa. He stopped his car in the middle of the street, jumped out despite the honking of the cars behind him and ran back into the hotel. He skidded to a stop at the lifts, startling several people who were standing waiting for it. As he waited he thought of using the stairs but Lissa’s room was on the 10th floor so they would be no quicker and he didn’t want to be out of breath for what might follow. The lift finally arrived. He leapt in ahead of the others and drew his gun causing them to step back in fear. He punched 10 and Close Doors. The lift took him smoothly up to the 10th floor. When the doors opened he peered out. Lissa’s door was closed which meant that whoever it was was either very charming or very good with locks.
He ran quietly to her door, knocked and spoke with a heavy Cockney accent.
"Room service. Your dry cleaning is ready."
There was a pause and then someone could be heard coming over to the door. As soon as it began to open Bond shoulder charged it with all his might knocking the figure on the other side backwards onto the carpet. As soon as he entered the room Bond registered three things very quickly. First, Lissa was lying on the bed with her eyes open but not moving. Second, the man on the floor was in fact Special Agent Jack Prowess. Third, Prowess had taken out a knife and was about to throw it. Bond fired as the knife left Prowess’s hand. The bullet hit Prowess in the right shoulder. The knife hit Bond in the chest but fell harmlessly to the floor. Somewhat surprised, Prowess reached inside his jacket with his other hand but Bond fired again hitting him in the left forearm. Prowess screamed and fell back, both arms now useless. Bond stepped forward and kicked him viciously in the head knocking him out cold.
*******EDITS HAVE BEEN MADE BELOW THIS POINT******
Bond leapt over to the bed and felt Lissa’s heart. There was no pulse that he could detect. Her neck was badly bruised - she had been strangled. Desperately he started resuscitation, pushing on her sternum for five counts and then breathing into her mouth for one. After a few attempts, her back convulsed and she coughed up a small amount of blood. She weakly opened her eyes. Bond breathed a sigh of relief. He leaned in and gently lifted her head, cradling the back of her neck.
"Are you alright?" Bond asked softly.
Lissa tried to speak, but had difficulty doing so. It seemed her vocal cords had been damaged.
"Do you think you can make it?" Bond asked worriedly.
Lissa responded slowly. "I..." She weakly reached her arm up and lovingly touched the side of Bond's face. Slowly, she lowered her arm back to the bed and rested her head in Bond's hand. Bond quickly checked her pulse--she had gone unconscious, yet she was still alive.
He gave a great groan of frustration. It didn’t make any sense. Why would anyone want to kill her? She didn’t know anything, she was no threat to anyone. After everything he had done to try and get her away from the monsters who had been using her since she was a child, she had just come inches between falling prey to them.
"Rest, my dear." He pulled a pillow over to her and laid her head in it. Angry, he walked over to the unconscious Prowess, hauled him roughly onto a chair and tied him to it with his own necktie. Then he searched him and divested him of a number of CIA gadgets. He noticed that Prowess was wearing the same white gloves he had been wearing when they first met at the airport. They no doubt contained DNA that would identify Prowess as Lissa’s attempted murderer. Bond pulled them off, turned them inside out and pocketed them.
*******EDITS HAVE BEEN MADE ABOVE THIS POINT*******
He went into the room’s ensuite and got a glass of water. He took a sip and then threw the rest in Prowess’s face. The other man stirred slightly. Bond backhanded Prowess savagely across the face and he started awake. Bond tapped his wounded right shoulder with the butt of his gun. Prowess grimaced in pain.
"Now that I have your full attention, I want some answers."
Prowess said nothing.
"Why Lissa?"
Prowess just stared at him. Bond tapped his left forearm. Prowess’s face was a rictus of agony but he remained silent. In spite of himself Bond had to admire the man’s self control. Prowess was bleeding heavily from his wounds so Bond had to get some answers fast.
"Either you start talking or I will call room service and order some tequila."
Prowess looked at him in surprise.
"So?"
"As I’m sure you are aware, tequila is served with two things - salt and lemon. Do you know what happens if you add either of these substances to an open wound?"
"I can’t tell you anything. If I do I’m a dead man."
"You think I won’t kill you? Think again. You’re a dead man either way. So why not do the right thing before you meet your Maker?"
Prowess stared into space for a moment. His face was becoming pale from blood loss.
"You’ll never find him. He’s too smart. He’s been playing MI6 for years. Playing you all like fools."
"Mister X?"
Prowess nodded.
"You admire him, don’t you?"
"He’s made me a very rich man."
"The money’s not much good to you dead though, is it?"
Prowess said nothing.
"Listen to me Prowess. Mister X, whoever he is, is a user. That’s what he does. He’s not interested in toppling governments or destroying the world. He likes the system just the way it is because he can manipulate it to do anything he wants. He’s used you and here you are, about to die."
Prowess glared impotent hatred at him. Bond picked up the room’s telephone and dialed room service.
"Yes, this is Mr Prowess in Room 1013. Can you please send up a bottle of tequila with plenty of salt and lemon? Thank you."
He replaced the receiver and looked at Prowess.
"And now we wait. But not for long - I believe the service in this hotel is excellent."
Prowess was weakening quickly. His breathing was shallow and uneven. Bond suddenly realised that he was manipulating his own breathing pattern to induce death as quickly as possible. Suddenly Prowess went rigid and then collapsed, his head lolling to one side, his eyes glassy and unseeing. He was dead.
*******EDITS HAVE BEEN MADE BELOW THIS POINT*******
Bond cursed his own stupidity for not spotting what Prowess was doing. He looked around the room and felt a sudden chill from all the recent violence that had happened, but felt a certain warmth when he saw Lissa on the bed, her chest rhythmically moving up and down as she was breathing. After looking around the room, he noticed Prowess’s knife lying on the floor near the door and picked it up. It was extremely heavy and at first Bond thought that it was made from iron but then realised that it was actually made from heavy black glass. More obsidian, he thought. It was double edged and razor sharp and would have killed him if it had penetrated his chest. He took out the heart flask that Lissa had given him.
Bond knew he had saved her life, yet he still felt that he had failed to protect her. It was a miracle she was still alive. Think, he berated himself. What do you now know that you didn’t before? An idea suddenly occurred to him. He opened his phone and scanned the list of names from the files that had been tampered with on his computer. Suddenly his eyes were drawn to one name in particular. Maximilian Obsidian. Prowess had an obsidian knife. Baker had been talking about obsidian just before he was killed. And he had seen some obsidian even earlier. At the Mortar and Pestle. The statue on Baba Yaga's mantle had been made from it. It had to be more than coincidence.
Bond looked at the heart flask that Lissa had given him. He tucked it away in his coat pocket and dialed a three-digit number on his phone.
"007. It's about Vasilissa. She's been badly injured. Crowne Plaza London St. James, Room Six-hundred and Ninety, send an ambulance immediately..." He went to hang up, then said to the operator, "You'll also find Mr. Prowess here. It seems we've found our mole." He hung up the phone and put it in the pocket of his slacks. He walked toward the door and turned around.
"I know who he is Lissa. And I'm going to stop him hurting girls like you. Just like you wanted."
Bond left the room and headed for the elevator.
*******EDITS END HERE*******
But if Bond contacts MI6 to say that Lissa needs medical help then Mister X's plot to set him up for her death is already foiled. Prowess would be interrogated by Bond after Bond had contacted MI6 requesting assistance for Lissa. The idea that Bond gets spirited away by Adriana to make him look like the murderer becomes unuseable.
Just a note:
Perhaps we could incorporate it into the story that she lays dying on the bed while fighting off Prowess. Perhaps this would work?
What does everyone think?
I've given my views so I say just do whatever you want to do.