Novel 6 Suggestion & Criticism Thread

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  • darenhatdarenhat The Old PuebloPosts: 2,029Quartermasters
    Lookin good, delicious. When I get a chance I'll incorporate the dripping glass into my entry. And good job with mentioning Bond's car. I thought we were going to have to drop a line in somewhere explaining why he doesn't hop in his vehicle and drive to safety.
  • DAWUSSDAWUSS My homepagePosts: 517MI6 Agent
    darenhat wrote:
    Lookin good, delicious. When I get a chance I'll incorporate the dripping glass into my entry. And good job with mentioning Bond's car. I thought we were going to have to drop a line in somewhere explaining why he doesn't hop in his vehicle and drive to safety.

    But as we know there's no such thing as a Bond plot without plot holes ;) :P


    I'm looking forward to see what follows this entry!
  • deliciousdelicious SydneyPosts: 371MI6 Agent
    I think we should have a character called Plothole [sounds Norther European doesnt it?] who turns up from time to time without adequate back story, motivation or logic. Just kidding. Maybe its time someone wrote a comedy Bond fanfic....
  • deliciousdelicious SydneyPosts: 371MI6 Agent
    here are two corrections to my last entry which I have to mention:

    1. "Baba Yaga sold me to him when I was ten. My family..."

    should read:

    "I was sold to Baba Yaga when I was ten. My family..."

    and:

    2. She nodded, then rested her head on his shoulder.

    should read:

    She rested her head on his shoulder.
  • Golrush007Golrush007 South AfricaPosts: 3,421Quartermasters
    edited June 2007
    My contribution is in - Bond is on the ground in England (just!!). I guess the next scene will be Bond reporting to M (no doubt after a good breakfast from his housekeeper, May. . . )

    By the way, since the Finnish civil aviation registrations start with the letters OH, I thought of giving the plane the registration OH-MSS, but I thought that might be a bit corny!!
  • deliciousdelicious SydneyPosts: 371MI6 Agent
    Perhaps Bond could find himself being pursued by MI6 agents as soon as he makes contact with M because someone has stolen his identity in his absence and infiltrated the organisation and stoilen something - perhaps something hitech that Q has been working on that allows very sophisticated identity theft, or maybe just hi-tech stuff that can be sold on the black market. Our villain likes infiltating places partly becuae its profitable and partly because he can (power psychosis involves an addiction to crossing boundaries, whether they be physical (like a secure installation) or psychological (invading someones personal space, kidnapping, hurting, abusing and killing). Mister X may have seen infiltrating MI6 as a challenge. All food for thought.
  • DAWUSSDAWUSS My homepagePosts: 517MI6 Agent
    delicious wrote:
    Perhaps Bond could find himself being pursued by MI6 agents as soon as he makes contact with M because someone has stolen his identity in his absence and infiltrated the organisation and stoilen something - perhaps something hitech that Q has been working on that allows very sophisticated identity theft, or maybe just hi-tech stuff that can be sold on the black market. Our villain likes infiltating places partly becuae its profitable and partly because he can (power psychosis involves an addiction to crossing boundaries, whether they be physical (like a secure installation) or psychological (invading someones personal space, kidnapping, hurting, abusing and killing). Mister X may have seen infiltrating MI6 as a challenge. All food for thought.


    That gives me an idea for my next entry (I know, it's still several posts away, but I think I can make it work depending on how things go...)
  • deliciousdelicious SydneyPosts: 371MI6 Agent
    DAWUSS wrote:
    darenhat wrote:
    Lookin good, delicious. When I get a chance I'll incorporate the dripping glass into my entry. And good job with mentioning Bond's car. I thought we were going to have to drop a line in somewhere explaining why he doesn't hop in his vehicle and drive to safety.

    But as we know there's no such thing as a Bond plot without plot holes ;) :P

    I'm looking forward to see what follows this entry!

    Scaramanga starts us off in the plane so we need to work out at why?

    (1) The plane is just where he ends up after escaping from Baba Yaga
    (2) The plane contains some kind of cargo that must be gotten to MI6 ASAP.
    (3) Bond is in a tight corner and can't reach his car and finds the plane while being pursued.
    (4) Carter arrived in Urjala using the plane and MI6 have a fix on its GPS signal or perhaps a homing device.
  • deliciousdelicious SydneyPosts: 371MI6 Agent
    The plane is first mentioned by Baba Yaga so Bond knows at this point that Magnus is flying a plane out of Urjala. Bond would want to investigate it re cargo etc. and then use it as an escape vehicle if need arose.

    Or we could get rid of Bonds car completely as I introduced it in my first entry - Bond might have parachuted into Finland although he would need a base of operations due to the cold weather. Perhaps a cabin in the woods. But if this was the case then Lissa would have to go on the plane with him to England.

    I will also add a bit to my last entry about the flight plan. Magnus would have lied to Lissa about taking her to Germany - his real intention was to have his way with ehr and then fly her to Delhi and sell her to someone there.
  • darenhatdarenhat The Old PuebloPosts: 2,029Quartermasters
    edited June 2007
    Good job, Golrush...now that Bond is back in England, perhaps we can start putting some pieces together.

    We will need to ascertain what was specifically Mister X's intentions with infiltrating MI6 via Carter. (which may correspond with the purpose of the plane and it's flightplan). There would have been one clue discovered already, since Bond was dispatched to assasinate Carter. What did MI6 discover about Carter's actions that lead them to this?

    We should also bear in mind that Baba Yaga will have informed Mister X that MI6 is on the trail. This might induce X to either change his strategy or move up his timetable on whatever scheme he has.

    I think this is a prime opportunity to give Tanner an appearance, keeping in mind that he most likely has been in the midst of scouring Carters desk to find out clues to Carter's espionage.
  • Willie GarvinWillie Garvin Posts: 1,412MI6 Agent
    edited June 2007
    delicious wrote:
    Perhaps Bond could find himself being pursued by MI6 agents as soon as he makes contact with M because someone has stolen his identity in his absence and infiltrated the organisation and stolen something - perhaps something hi-tech that Q has been working on that allows very sophisticated identity theft, or maybe just hi-tech stuff that can be sold on the black market. Our villain likes infiltating places partly becuae its profitable and partly because he can (power psychosis involves an addiction to crossing boundaries, whether they be physical (like a secure installation) or psychological (invading someones personal space, kidnapping, hurting, abusing and killing). Mister X may have seen infiltrating MI6 as a challenge. All food for thought.


    Excellent ideas.What if Mr.X runs a remotely located facility(call it a school or training centre,or estate,or camp,whatever) where he employs people who train others to assume the identities of those in important postions--the British Secret Service,for instance(something like, but much more advanced than the secret Soviet camp where Red Grant was trained in From Russia With Love).This might help to explain where Carter came from, and why he would know enough to reach a position where he could be awarded Double-O status.Perhaps there are even plastic surgeons at Mr.X's "school" available to help potential spies take on the looks of those agents they might be taught to replace.

    Perhaps Mr.X has/had some sort of tie to the Intelligence Community which we've yet to disclose.

    Such a situation might make life very difficult for 007.

    Just a thought...
  • DAWUSSDAWUSS My homepagePosts: 517MI6 Agent
    delicious wrote:
    Perhaps Bond could find himself being pursued by MI6 agents as soon as he makes contact with M because someone has stolen his identity in his absence and infiltrated the organisation and stolen something - perhaps something hi-tech that Q has been working on that allows very sophisticated identity theft, or maybe just hi-tech stuff that can be sold on the black market. Our villain likes infiltating places partly becuae its profitable and partly because he can (power psychosis involves an addiction to crossing boundaries, whether they be physical (like a secure installation) or psychological (invading someones personal space, kidnapping, hurting, abusing and killing). Mister X may have seen infiltrating MI6 as a challenge. All food for thought.


    Excellent ideas.What if Mr.X runs a remotely located facility(call it a school or training centre,or estate,or camp,whatever) where he employs people who train others to assume the identies of those in important postions--the British Secret Service,for instance(something like, but much more advanced than the secret Soviet camp where Red Grant was trained in From Russia With Love).This might help to explain where Carter came from, and why he could know enough to reach a position where he could be awarded Double-O status.Perhaps there are even plastic surgeons at Mr.X's "school" available to help potential spies take on the looks of those agents they might be taught to replace.

    Perhaps Mr.X has/had some sort of tie to the Intelligence Community we've yet to disclose.

    Such a situation might make life very difficult for 007.

    Just a thought...

    I think it may be more cost-effective for X to change the image of the identity victim (ie, the photo on the ID card is changed) than to change the image of the imposter. Now, for the famous, you'd obviously have to change the image of the imposter and all (since everyone would know what the famous person would look like). I was thinking that X would carefully select the individuals whose identities he'll take, working on subtlety at first, then building his way to the famous and such.

    Someone(s) like the 00-Agent section could work because very few people know what they look like.


    If we do have 007's identity stolen, I think he should be able to convince M of that fact early and quickly, and possibly have him investigate the identities of those stolen (possibly a few house visits?).

    Also, could X's recruits come from that slave ring Baba Yaga's apparently a part of?
  • darenhatdarenhat The Old PuebloPosts: 2,029Quartermasters
    delicious wrote:
    Perhaps Bond could find himself being pursued by MI6 agents as soon as he makes contact with M because someone has stolen his identity in his absence and infiltrated the organisation and stoilen something - perhaps something hitech that Q has been working on that allows very sophisticated identity theft, or maybe just hi-tech stuff that can be sold on the black market. Our villain likes infiltating places partly becuae its profitable and partly because he can (power psychosis involves an addiction to crossing boundaries, whether they be physical (like a secure installation) or psychological (invading someones personal space, kidnapping, hurting, abusing and killing). Mister X may have seen infiltrating MI6 as a challenge. All food for thought.

    I think the idea of stealing technology stands up well, but not the 'sophisticated identity theft' equipment. Maybe I'm overthinking it, but the concept of a villian using a sophisticated identity theft operation to steal sophisticated identity theft equipment seems too overwrought. Since MI6 is an intelligence agency, I think the goal of infiltrating MI6 should be intelligence.

    But I like the idea that X is stealing technological secrets, but perhaps that's taking place in another agency that is more devoted to military research.
  • deliciousdelicious SydneyPosts: 371MI6 Agent
    I just had the idea that Mister X sees himself as an outsourced espionage organisation - he may get contracts to steal information from various governments and corporations. "Outsourcing is the futue Mr Bond" is the line I had in mind when the villain finally monologues.
  • DAWUSSDAWUSS My homepagePosts: 517MI6 Agent
    delicious wrote:
    I just had the idea that Mister X sees himself as an outsourced espionage organisation - he may get contracts to steal information from various governments and corporations. "Outsourcing is the futue Mr Bond" is the line I had in mind when the villain finally monologues.

    IMO contacts would work better than contracts.

    Besides, if he's stealing IDs, his money could come from the bank accounts of his victims
  • darenhatdarenhat The Old PuebloPosts: 2,029Quartermasters
    edited June 2007
    delicious wrote:
    I just had the idea that Mister X sees himself as an outsourced espionage organisation - he may get contracts to steal information from various governments and corporations. "Outsourcing is the futue Mr Bond" is the line I had in mind when the villain finally monologues.

    This is kind of the idea that I was bouncing around earlier in the thread. If Mister X has peppered his 'agents' in various places, he is then in a position to make gobs of money from paying clients. In this case, if he had Carter on the inside track, China, Iran, even paying terrorist organizations can get information (or seed disinformation) within MI6. I can already see X bragging to Bond about how the list of MI6's 00 agent dossiers is one of his 'top sellers'. Do you ever wonder how the villians in the Bond movies happen to know so much about 007? Maybe those villians were clients of Mister X.

    Identity theft is a means to an end. While Mister X can milk the random individual bank account here and there (maybe that's how he got his start), the real dough is in selling corporate and state secrets.

    A few months back I attended a breakfast where the key speaker was the son of the man who started Blockbuster video. He got his start in garbage collection and is now a multi-millionaire. The key to his success? Buy one video or grabage can and rent it over and over to people. I can see Mister X like this with state secrets. Steal it once, sell it hundred times.
  • Willie GarvinWillie Garvin Posts: 1,412MI6 Agent
    darenhat wrote:
    delicious wrote:
    I just had the idea that Mister X sees himself as an outsourced espionage organisation - he may get contracts to steal information from various governments and corporations. "Outsourcing is the futue Mr Bond" is the line I had in mind when the villain finally monologues.

    This is kind of the idea that I was bouncing around earlier in the thread. If Mister X has peppered his 'agents' in various places, he is then in a position to make gobs of money from paying clients. In this case, if he had Carter on the inside track, China, Iran, even paying terrorist organizations can get information (or seed disinformation) within MI6. I can already see X bragging to Bond about how the list of MI6's 00 agent dossiers is one of his 'top sellers'. Do you ever wonder how the villians in the Bond movies happen to know so much about 007? Maybe those villians were clients of Mister X.

    Identity theft is a means to an end. While Mister X can milk the random individual bank account here and there (maybe that's how he got his start), the real dough is in selling corporate and state secrets.

    A few months back I attended a breakfast where the key speaker was the son of the man who started Blockbuster video. He got his start in garbage collection and is now a multi-millionaire. The key to his success? Buy one video or grabage can and rent it over and over to people. I can see Mister X like this with state secrets. Steal it once, sell it hundred times.


    I like this very much.It offers Mr.X some clear-cut (and nefarious) goals and also helps to explain Carter's true role once he made the promotion to Double-O.There might be any number of sleeper agents across the globe in a wide variety of important organizations just waiting to receive Mr X's signal to go into action.
  • scaramanga1scaramanga1 The English RivieraPosts: 845Chief of Staff
    darenhat wrote:
    delicious wrote:
    I just had the idea that Mister X sees himself as an outsourced espionage organisation - he may get contracts to steal information from various governments and corporations. "Outsourcing is the futue Mr Bond" is the line I had in mind when the villain finally monologues.

    This is kind of the idea that I was bouncing around earlier in the thread. If Mister X has peppered his 'agents' in various places, he is then in a position to make gobs of money from paying clients. In this case, if he had Carter on the inside track, China, Iran, even paying terrorist organizations can get information (or seed disinformation) within MI6. I can already see X bragging to Bond about how the list of MI6's 00 agent dossiers is one of his 'top sellers'. Do you ever wonder how the villians in the Bond movies happen to know so much about 007? Maybe those villians were clients of Mister X.

    Identity theft is a means to an end. While Mister X can milk the random individual bank account here and there (maybe that's how he got his start), the real dough is in selling corporate and state secrets.

    A few months back I attended a breakfast where the key speaker was the son of the man who started Blockbuster video. He got his start in garbage collection and is now a multi-millionaire. The key to his success? Buy one video or grabage can and rent it over and over to people. I can see Mister X like this with state secrets. Steal it once, sell it hundred times.


    I like this very much.It offers Mr.X some clear-cut (and nefarious) goals and also helps to explain Carter's true role once he made the promotion to Double-O.There might be any number of sleeper agents across the globe in a wide variety of important organizations just waiting to receive Mr X's signal to go into action.

    I certainly think this is a really good way to go -it Makes MR X into the kind of villain that we really wish 007 to bring down. Identity theft along with this sort of espionage is perfect for such a tale.
  • DAWUSSDAWUSS My homepagePosts: 517MI6 Agent
    I was also thinking (this'll probably be something further down the line) that X will manipulate Bond into furthering his (X's) own means, and of course, since Bond hasn't seen X, he would have an easier time going by an invented or stolen identity. Perhaps to provide a convincing act, X could save Bond's life on one occasion.
  • darenhatdarenhat The Old PuebloPosts: 2,029Quartermasters
    DAWUSS wrote:
    I was also thinking (this'll probably be something further down the line) that X will manipulate Bond into furthering his (X's) own means, and of course, since Bond hasn't seen X, he would have an easier time going by an invented or stolen identity. Perhaps to provide a convincing act, X could save Bond's life on one occasion.

    Very nice, idea. DAWUSS. I imagine X living several different lives, and enjoys taking on different personas. Having Bond unwittingly rub shoulders with him while hunting him down would be a great idea.
  • deliciousdelicious SydneyPosts: 371MI6 Agent
    With the "Mission Impossible" rubber face technology now a reality, (Robert De Niro in Frankenstein, Robin Williams in Mrs Doubtfire etc) it would be easy for Mister X to completely change is features for various identities. One thing he might neglect to do (and perhaps this is how Bond catches him out) is that his hands would always look the same. Will he impersonate both sexes or just men?
  • Willie GarvinWillie Garvin Posts: 1,412MI6 Agent
    darenhat wrote:
    DAWUSS wrote:
    I was also thinking (this'll probably be something further down the line) that X will manipulate Bond into furthering his (X's) own means, and of course, since Bond hasn't seen X, he would have an easier time going by an invented or stolen identity. Perhaps to provide a convincing act, X could save Bond's life on one occasion.

    Very nice, idea. DAWUSS. I imagine X living several different lives, and enjoys taking on different personas. Having Bond unwittingly rub shoulders with him while hunting him down would be a great idea.


    Another good idea.

    Here's a thought-nothing special or even original but it might be useful.

    What if "Baba Yaga" is actually a beautiful and extremely dangerous young woman who works directly for Mr.X, and as part of her job, takes on various disguises--sometimes including posing as the famous witch of folk tales in order to have a measure of control over superstitious people.She'd have other identities as well, each one suited to specific locales--maybe three personas at the most.Armed with these facades she could perhaps function as one of our story's colorful femme fatales.For example,I can see her charming 007 and utimately putting him into a dangerous situation with the hopes of either capturing or killing him.All of this under Mr.X's directives,of course--because she's absolutely loyal to X.
  • deliciousdelicious SydneyPosts: 371MI6 Agent
    http://www.mythinglinks.org/BabaYaga.html

    "To be sent to Baba Yaga was tantamount to being sent to one's death..."

    She trades in human flesh and destroys lives - kidnapping and enslaving children and selling them to labour camps, sweat shops and into prostitution. She is one of Mister X's suppliers - he probably has others in Africa, the Middle East, South East Asia and South America.

    The idea of being a "nobody" because of slavery relates to our theme. Perhaps Mister X sifts through the slaves to find people who can be trained and given false identities.

    Im not crazy about the idea of Baba Yaga actually being young and beautiful but if others want to run with it, I will too. It's best not to block any ideas at this stage.
  • deliciousdelicious SydneyPosts: 371MI6 Agent
    Another correction to my last entry from when Bond is deciphering the flight plan:

    "It says ‘Flight Plan’."

    "What is the destination?"

    "Delhi, Etu-Intia….Delhi, India."

    She stared at the document in disbelief.

    "That cant be right. He said he was flying to Germany. He lied to me."

    Bond nodded. He was not surprised but he needed to know more.

    "And the departure date and time?"

    "Today. Nine o’clock this morning."

    "As I thought."

    "Why would he take me to India?"

    Bond looked at her grimly.

    "To sell you to another sweat shop - or worse."

    She looked at him in despair. Bond found her expression almost heart-breaking. She deserved better than this.
  • Willie GarvinWillie Garvin Posts: 1,412MI6 Agent
    delicious wrote:
    Another correction to my last entry from when Bond is deciphering the flight plan:

    "It says ‘Flight Plan’."

    "What is the destination?"

    "Delhi, Etu-Intia….Delhi, India."

    She stared at the document in disbelief.

    "That cant be right. He said he was flying to Germany. He lied to me."

    Bond nodded. He was not surprised but he needed to know more.

    "And the departure date and time?"

    "Today. Nine o’clock this morning."

    "As I thought."

    "Why would he take me to India?"

    Bond looked at her grimly.

    "To sell you to another sweat shop - or worse."

    She looked at him in despair. Bond found her expression almost heart-breaking. She deserved better than this.


    Delicious--your edit key will help you make all the corrections you need.Just go back to the post that needs editing, click onto it, and then press "edit".You'll be able to revise your entries to your heart's content.;)

    (I'd be lost without this function.:) )

    Oh,and about that female master of disguise thing--it's been done many times before(I know,because I've done it).Anyway,I'm not married to the idea at all.It just came off the top of my head--like dandruff.

    If we're really going to have a master of disguises it probably should be Mr.X--and Mr.X alone.Maybe his ability to change his features is why everyone calls him "Mr.X"...:))

    Just another thought.:)
  • DAWUSSDAWUSS My homepagePosts: 517MI6 Agent
    If BY was going to be running around under mutliple guises, I would think she would assume the identities of other grandmotherly-ish women
  • darenhatdarenhat The Old PuebloPosts: 2,029Quartermasters
    A thought I was bouncing around was what if 'Baba Yaga' was more of a title than actual person...a sort of mantle that the 'slave trafficker' is given for Mister X's operation. In that case, there could be more than one Baba Yaga. And if one is eliminated, a new one takes her place.

    It was just a thought. I imagined a scene in which Mister X 'promotes' an individual to Baba Yaga's position after Bond eliminates her - in a sense, then, 'Baba Yaga' is immortal and will keep crossing Bond.
  • deliciousdelicious SydneyPosts: 371MI6 Agent
    delicious wrote:


    Delicious--your edit key will help you make all the corrections you need.Just go back to the post that needs editing, click onto it, and then press "edit".You'll be able to revise your entries to your heart's content.;)

    (I'd be lost without this function.:) )

    Thanks very much Willie. I'm so smart I'm stupid sometimes - I never thought to ask what the Edit button means! Doh!
  • deliciousdelicious SydneyPosts: 371MI6 Agent
    I was rereading my transition from darenhat's torture scene and realised that Seppo is lying in the snow next to Bond so Bond could have scavenged some of his clothing to keep warm. Either Bond has not time to do this or he does it but still seeks shelter because he is being pursued or Seppo doesnt crash through the window. It doesnt need to be resolved right now but will need to be addressed eventually (with amny other glitches no doubt).
  • darenhatdarenhat The Old PuebloPosts: 2,029Quartermasters
    edited June 2007
    Perhaps Bond makes a hasty exit because he hears approaching voices...this would also give some explanation as to why he feels it unsafe to head back to his vehicle - instead seeking cover in the nearby woods.

    Maybe Magnus appeared at the cabin searching for Bond?
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