Future Bond One Liners

Shatterhand67

OK this is going to be a little off color but what do you think would be a funny one liner in the next Bond film.

Here's my entry which I came up with after a few beers with a friend a day or so ago.

Bond is in bed with the new Bond girl and he's under the covers (you all know what he's doing...younger readers will get this in a few years) and he says to her as he comes up for air, "Why, you're just as beautiful on the inside."

I cracked myself and my friend up with this one but let me know what you guys think. I think this would be as good as the handcuffs remark in QOS ....but...Perhaps it will be thought of more along the lines of "I thought Christmas only came once a year."

Line em up boys (and ladies). I want to see what you think would be funny.

james362001

If the Bond Girl is too old she would be off-color. The senior gents know what I mean.

Number24

I have a one-liner,or rather Empire or Total Film had one: Bond confronts someone with his pistol and says "Meet Walther".

Thunderpussy

Bond killing a villian by exploding his car, quipping " He's gone to Blazes " or "there goes an Old flame "
Bond drowning someone in soup, quipping "His dying Broth "
Bond killing someone by spiking them to the floor, "That should keep him Pinned down "
Bond killing with a lamp, "Lights out "
Bond killing in a Retirement home turning to the patients saying, "That's Old Folks !"

thesecretagent

All we need now is to dust off Sir Rog and Bond 23 is as good as ready....

Thunderpussy

Believe it or not, I take that as a Compliment )

Thunderpussy

Leading lady goes pour a drimk saying " I could use a stiff one " to which Bond Raising an eyebrow answers
"Yes, I was thinking along those lines too " )

thesecretagent

Thunderpussy recently crashed his car on the way to work. He didn't set off in a Capri, but when the dust settled, he was behind the wheel of a 3 litre Ghia stuck in the seventies. His sunglasses had become "shades" and were finished in chrome with holes in the arms, his jacket was leather and his trousers were tight. Soon he found himself drawn to an office, where a desk lay before him. A selection of Pirrelli calenders with pictures of girls draped over car bonnets confirmed his time-warp as 1979. A pile of paper on the desk confirmed he was in fact a staff script writer, working on a new James Bond film (between a pilot episode of something called The Professionals and a new series of Jason King)...

Thunderpussy

) Fire up the Quatro ! )

james362001

I just love the naughty dialogue between Pierce Brosnan, Judi Dench and Samantha Bond. Bond was told in Tomorrow Never Dies (1997) that he needed to get information from "Paris Carver". He was to "pump her for information". Miss Moneypenny said he would have to decide how much pumping was necessary.

Thunderpussy

Bond's top 140 quotes. B-)

http://youtu.be/EmqF4kzbaS8