Lines you Cringe at

Thunderpussy

On some other threads there are some discussions on should the one-liners and quips make
a big come back. Have any members got "Favourite " lines from the Bonds that make them
cringe.
Here are a Few of Mine.

the Help me find the stationery line from QOS
I thought christmas only comes Once, TWINE
"That should keep you in curry for a few weeks "
Infact most of the jokes in the indian car chase
"This should shake them off " etc Octopussy
"put your clothers on and I'll buy you an Icecream". FYEO
"He had lots of Guts " OHMSS

Higgins

The " you took my armor off" rubbish in Casino Royale is by far the worst line that I have ever heard.
And believe me, synced in german does not get it any better! 8-)

If someone really believes that women work like that - good luck!

Napoleon Plural

Wow, I was gonna start a thread like this....

"This is the latter..." from Vesper in CR. Such an unnatural line, you can't say 'the latter' without sounding like a knob.

'Charming, charming,' dirty old lech Kerim Bey.

"He still thinks I'm a virgin.' Oh joy to be watching FYEO when you're 11 with your parents.

'G'day! My names Bond, James Bond!!' It's a long way from Walkabout pub, mate.

Most of the stuff by Judi Dench when she's given a really long line and doesn't know to pause half way through it.

'Ne--ever!' by Brozzer, braying like a donkey at end of TND scene.

And any line by Dalton when he's trying to be funny, it's like Farmer Boldwood trying to whoop it up when he thinks he's gonna marry Bathsheba in Far from the Madding Crowd. An eerie feel of doom descends.

Thunderpussy

"He still thinks I'm a virgin.' Oh joy to be watching FYEO when you're 11 with your parents.

) ) )

Had a similar experience.

Thunderpussy

From Octopussy, the "Sit " line to the ( very unconvincing stuffed tiger )

Infact I do enjoy Octopussy, But it musy have some of the worst/embarrassing lines
the Tarzan yell for example.

minigeff

"i seet on eet bot dornt taek eet weeth mee"

as a 13 year old i thought i was pretty slick figuring that out as quick as bond. 17 years later and i realise its a riddle a 5 year old would work out in half the time.

zaphod

Too many to list really...but the whole 'Armour off thing grates' the funniest is the gangsters bint in LTK ' I love James' any of the Jolly Roger's lame quips O'h and the 'strawberry jam' line in LALD to name but a few

Napoleon Plural

LALD? Jam featured in TLD surely.

Peppermill

"Don't worry, we gave her a nice honeymoooooooooooooooooooooooooooon"

thesecretagent

"Rolex?"
"Omega"
"mmm beautiful..."

Casino Royale. Utterly, utterly cringeworthy.

Thunderpussy

I'll have to defend the "Strawberry jam " Line as I think it's one of Fleming's from the short story.

minigeff

"aaaaaayve sheen a lotta wimen come, and go (hic)"

"i wanna deep 6 him"

the pisshead sleeze artist that is milton crest

Blackleiter

Zap already mentioned the line that makes me cringe the most - Lupe in LTK when she says "I love James...so much!" It's not so much the words as the truly awful delivery by Talisa Soto. Plus, there was nothing in the movie that would even remotely suggest that Lupe had fallen deeply in love with Bond.

Second place - "I'll buy you a delicatessen - in stainless steel!", courtesy of the Blofeld lookalike featured in the PTS of For Your Eyes Only.

Thunderpussy

"I'll buy you a delicatessen - in stainless steel!",

How could I of forgotten That one. )

Napoleon Plural

Going to the Barbican exhibition, where they have Talisa Soto up on the wall, quoting her brief dialogue, emphasises that she really should have been dubbed, after all, Slyvia Trench, Honey Rider and Jill Masterton all were, to name but a few.

Peppermill

I don't want to re-use the lines other people posted, but I agree with most of you, Bond movies have quite a few cringe worthy lines. How about:

Tanner: Why don't you try the identigraph?
Gray: Mmmmmmmmmmmmmmm!
Bond: Yes, sir.
Tanner: Well get cracking, 007!
Frederick Gray: Mmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm!
Bond: Minister....

Halcon

The minute Red Grant opens his mouth...(drawn out cringe sounds)...

GordoLeiter

"This never happend to the other fella!"

The most UNNESSARY line in all the 007 films, we know its a new actor, why does Bond need to acknowlege that.

ZorinIndustries

"I think I got the thrust of it..." - Jynx DAD

"I thought Christmas only comes once a year." - Bond TWINE

"Anything the matter, Sir Hilary?"
"I've got a slight stiffness... (pause) in my shoulder. Due to the altitude, no doubt." - OHMSS

"I'm in no hurry... are you?" - LALD : Seemed creepy for some reason.

"She's just coming, sir." - TMWTGG : Clever, but I do cringe a bit hahaha

"*Giggling in shower* Oooo!" - AVTAK : Roger Moore was at the end of his reign, enough said.


I cringe at all of these, but you gotta love em. After all, 007 is 007.... )

GordoLeiter

"Ca....ca...CAIRO!"

ZorinIndustries

Blackleiter wrote:

Zap already mentioned the line that makes me cringe the most - Lupe in LTK when she says "I love James...so much!" It's not so much the words as the truly awful delivery by Talisa Soto. Plus, there was nothing in the movie that would even remotely suggest that Lupe had fallen deeply in love with Bond.

Second place - "I'll buy you a delicatessen - in stainless steel!", courtesy of the Blofeld lookalike featured in the PTS of For Your Eyes Only.

Hahaha so true for LTK! I thought the women were weak, but Pam Bouvier at least made her case. And FYEO... I never understood that quote haha. I'm still trying to figure that one out )

thesecretagent

I hate the stationary line in QOS. Still don't understand it.

thesecretagent

GordoLeiter wrote:

"Ca....ca...CAIRO!"

And without moving his lips. Terrible.

GordoLeiter

thesecretagent wrote:

GordoLeiter wrote:

"Ca....ca...CAIRO!"

And without moving his lips. Terrible.

Yep, guess they were lazy to do another take of that scene and have the guy actually mouth the words.

zaphod

Napoleon Plural wrote:

LALD? Jam featured in TLD surely.

Of course you are right, sometimes my Dyslexia gets the better of me if I don't thoroughly check before hitting 'submit'

Also TP pointed out that it is a Fleming line. Upon reflection it is perhaps Dalton's delivery that jars rather than the line itself (unusual for me as I am a huge TD fan ) he sounds particularly Northern when he says it. Before I get flak I have no issue with being from the North of England,
But this is before the reboot and the altered states Bondiverse so this Bond should not have a Norhern accent. For the most part in the movie he does not.

Napoleon Plural

Yeah, he's hamming it up, in time with fixing his rifle (what's the phrase, tsa?)... It's all, yeah, we get it, you're a serious Bond.

minigeff

M and Moneypenny's "pumping for information" lines in TND.

I have never, ever heard anyone regard trying to obtain information from someone as 'pumping'. Its such a forced piece of innuendo IMO. they should have just said "look jim, ya gonna have to hop on the back foot and give her the what for".

zaphod

minigeff wrote:

M and Moneypenny's "pumping for information" lines in TND.

I have never, ever heard anyone regard trying to obtain information from someone as 'pumping'. Its such a forced piece of innuendo IMO. they should have just said "look jim, ya gonna have to hop on the back foot and give her the what for".

Agreed not a great line, but a fairly common London phrase meaning to Weadle information from someone unwilling to divulge it.

minigeff

zaphod wrote:

minigeff wrote:

M and Moneypenny's "pumping for information" lines in TND.

I have never, ever heard anyone regard trying to obtain information from someone as 'pumping'. Its such a forced piece of innuendo IMO. they should have just said "look jim, ya gonna have to hop on the back foot and give her the what for".

Agreed not a great line, but a fairly common London phrase meaning to Weadle information from someone unwilling to divulge it.

Ah it's one of them 'landan fraises' is it? Up here in the sticks we use a more straight forward term; "tel meh oar al slot yer". If that fails its "yet bera watc yasen, na 'k-off". )

zaphod

minigeff wrote:

zaphod wrote:

minigeff wrote:

M and Moneypenny's "pumping for information" lines in TND.

I have never, ever heard anyone regard trying to obtain information from someone as 'pumping'. Its such a forced piece of innuendo IMO. they should have just said "look jim, ya gonna have to hop on the back foot and give her the what for".

Agreed not a great line, but a fairly common London phrase meaning to Weadle information from someone unwilling to divulge it.

Ah it's one of them 'landan fraises' is it? Up here in the sticks we use a more straight forward term; "tel meh oar al slot yer". If that fails its "yet bera watc yasen, na 'k-off". )

You misunderstand dear boy, on so many levels one hardly knows where to start. It's not that we in what you quaintly call ' Landan' do not have colourful phrases of our own to denote direct extraction of intel by force, it's just that ' pumping' is not such a practice in its self. It is more akin to clever or persistent questioning. The secondary point ( which I must confess I thought that I had made quite clear, but obviously not clear enough) was that your objection to the line seemed predicated upon it being a made up phrase rather than an instance of an idiom. So once again for the sake of clarity, not a great line, but not something non existent in speech just to fit the scene. Although not a very good one it is in fact double entrende.

Hardyboy

I can't believe no one's mentioned this. . .in Dr. No, when Bond tells Quarrel, "Fetch my shoes!" Easily the most cringe-worthy line in the entire Bond series!

Of the Bonds I've seen in the theaters, there are only two times I've physically cringed. The first wasn't at a line, but during the PTS of AVTAK, when "California Girls" popped up on the soundtrack. Ugh. The second time was during LTK, when Lupe asks, "Are you loco?" I was in Tucson, AZ, and there was a group of Hispanics in front of me who all snickered at the line. I pretty much wanted to slink away. . .