Thunderbird 2 has let this once fine Drinking Establishment go to the Dogs.
How much are those Ham Sandwiches?
(Emerges from the gents in full IR biohazard suit Voice is through a digital speaker).
I have just fully decontaminated the mess in there. I heard that Captain Scarlet! No Snakebite for you for that!! You are on the cola floats for the rest of tonight. And that is not ham in those sandwiches.
Pussy, I had to take the batteries out of your A.R.S.E for a couple of hours. What were you thinking of putting Holly's Kitty Crunchies up there? She was all over it till I fed her! I have an hour and one half's Oxygen left, so will clean up the Ladies Loo now. Here Holly! Rats time!
Cat jumps up and pads after TB2 into the ladies loo. TB2 picks up a large plunger marked ACME en route.
This is Thunderbird 2, how can I be of assistance?
Thunderbird 2East of Cardiff, Wales.Posts: 2,820MI6 Agent
Go ahead No 24. I have taken the crunchies out, shoved the batteries in the A.N.U.S. (Automatic Network Utility System) on the underside of the landlords A.R.S.E. It should work fine now. Just be sure to give the bottle a firm tug when you pull it out, so the machine registers the deposit.
Toilets are now immaculate. Large Ginger Raspberry please landlord. (Nods at Capt Scarlet) in a clean glass please!
This is Thunderbird 2, how can I be of assistance?
I hope as well as my A.R.S.E you're all making use of the keypad for automated
Drinks, the Digitally Integrated Numerical Generator or D.O.N.G. please remember
To get orders to my A.R.S.E you must first use my D.O.N.G. Thank you.
"I've been informed that there ARE a couple of QAnon supporters who are fairly regular posters in AJB."
Thunderbird 2East of Cardiff, Wales.Posts: 2,820MI6 Agent
Apart from running repairs, I am keeping away from that thing. I don't trust the way its red eye sweeps the room like a wall mounted Cylon.
As for the D.O.N.G there are some buttons I will not press. Pussy at this rate with all these dodgy bolt ons you are going to end up becoming a cross between Granville*, Quark and R! Or possibly Professor Bunsen. And no I am NOT Dr Beaker!
* Still Open All Hours not the original.
This is Thunderbird 2, how can I be of assistance?
I hope as well as my A.R.S.E you're all making use of the keypad for automated
Drinks, the Digitally Integrated Numerical Generator or D.O.N.G. please remember
To get orders to my A.R.S.E you must first use my D.O.N.G. Thank you.
Thanks to your D.O.N.G. I finally got a bottle of coke from Your A.R.S.E. But can your A.R.S.E be use to open the bottle?
;% ) Thanks Sir Miles, it's Digitally Organised Numeric Generator.
Or D.O.N.G.
Yes, Number24, there's a bottle opener on the side of the machine, tied on with a
Bit of string.
"I've been informed that there ARE a couple of QAnon supporters who are fairly regular posters in AJB."
Yes indeed, String ! -{ another great British invention
Also a Big Happy Mother's Day to all the Mums out there. {[]
I'm reminded of the scene in LALD, when Adam tells some of his workers
" Now move you Mothers ... " I think this shows how forward thinking Mr Big was
Employing so many older ladies, showing maybe he wasn't all bad. )
"I've been informed that there ARE a couple of QAnon supporters who are fairly regular posters in AJB."
AOS wrote " When was the last Time the Bins were taken out?".
Our bins have a very active social life and are out many nights.
To Number24, Yes there is a built in breathalyser, simply press your lips
To the rear ...... and Blow.
"I've been informed that there ARE a couple of QAnon supporters who are fairly regular posters in AJB."
Evening all - a pint of Peroni for me please, Barman (when in Rome send all that)
Unusual technology in this bar, usually miniaturisation means things get smaller, but that Digital Organised Numerical Generator is the opposite - it's possibly the largest D.O.N.G. I've ever seen in the S&BS. Perhaps because of a snakebite if I heard the earlier conversation correctly?
How did Pierce get on with the voice coaching, Barman? Was it a bit like The King's Speech?
No these should be fine as I've sucked the salt off them to make them
a bit healthier.
"I've been informed that there ARE a couple of QAnon supporters who are fairly regular posters in AJB."
Thunderbird 2East of Cardiff, Wales.Posts: 2,820MI6 Agent
edited March 2015
Sadly, there are some cleaning tasks I won't undertake, so I sprayed them with pisstaside, I mean pesticide and left it at that. Pussy hasn't changed colour, so you should be Ok Captain Scarlet.
Rather you than me though. I'll never munch on the pub nuts. Far too dangerous for me.
Ginger Raspberry please Landlord!
This is Thunderbird 2, how can I be of assistance?
Comments
How much are those Ham Sandwiches?
Even worse - what if WE start getting self aware?
(Emerges from the gents in full IR biohazard suit Voice is through a digital speaker).
I have just fully decontaminated the mess in there. I heard that Captain Scarlet! No Snakebite for you for that!! You are on the cola floats for the rest of tonight. And that is not ham in those sandwiches.
Pussy, I had to take the batteries out of your A.R.S.E for a couple of hours. What were you thinking of putting Holly's Kitty Crunchies up there? She was all over it till I fed her! I have an hour and one half's Oxygen left, so will clean up the Ladies Loo now. Here Holly! Rats time!
Cat jumps up and pads after TB2 into the ladies loo. TB2 picks up a large plunger marked ACME en route.
Toilets are now immaculate. Large Ginger Raspberry please landlord. (Nods at Capt Scarlet) in a clean glass please!
Drinks, the Digitally Integrated Numerical Generator or D.O.N.G. please remember
To get orders to my A.R.S.E you must first use my D.O.N.G. Thank you.
As for the D.O.N.G there are some buttons I will not press. Pussy at this rate with all these dodgy bolt ons you are going to end up becoming a cross between Granville*, Quark and R! Or possibly Professor Bunsen. And no I am NOT Dr Beaker!
* Still Open All Hours not the original.
Oh no we don't!
(well, it IS mother's day) :x
Errr, yeah....you may want to look at that acronym again
Thanks to your D.O.N.G. I finally got a bottle of coke from Your A.R.S.E. But can your A.R.S.E be use to open the bottle?
Or D.O.N.G.
Yes, Number24, there's a bottle opener on the side of the machine, tied on with a
Bit of string.
Also a Big Happy Mother's Day to all the Mums out there. {[]
I'm reminded of the scene in LALD, when Adam tells some of his workers
" Now move you Mothers ... " I think this shows how forward thinking Mr Big was
Employing so many older ladies, showing maybe he wasn't all bad.
The mind is telling me "no" but the alcoholic in me is saying, go on, press the D.O.N.G.
Our bins have a very active social life and are out many nights.
To Number24, Yes there is a built in breathalyser, simply press your lips
To the rear ...... and Blow.
Unusual technology in this bar, usually miniaturisation means things get smaller, but that Digital Organised Numerical Generator is the opposite - it's possibly the largest D.O.N.G. I've ever seen in the S&BS. Perhaps because of a snakebite if I heard the earlier conversation correctly?
How did Pierce get on with the voice coaching, Barman? Was it a bit like The King's Speech?
I've also got a new line in salty nuts, if you can reach them
They're just behind the D.O.N.G.
a bit healthier.
Rather you than me though. I'll never munch on the pub nuts. Far too dangerous for me.
Ginger Raspberry please Landlord!