No discussion: The political jokes thread

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  • Number24Number24 NorwayPosts: 22,312MI6 Agent
    Some think conservatives make bad comedians and liberals make bad action heroes. They may or may not have a point. Judging by the conservative members lack of activity on this thread they are right, but judging by their activities in other parts of the forum they sometimes try their best :p.
    No, seriously it would be nice if the posts here were a little more diverse.
    I know of several liberal comedians in the US (Last Week Tonight, Michael Moore etc.) Who are the best and best known more politically conservative comedians?
  • LoeffelholzLoeffelholz The United States, With LovePosts: 8,998Quartermasters
    My experience is that liberals have a brilliant sense of humour when conservatives are being ridiculed -not so much when the joke's on them.

    That this site lacks a diversity of political expression (or 'humour') should surprise no one. Nobody wants to be the last Texan in the Alamo when Santa Ana and his boys are holding court.
    Check out my Amazon author page! Mark Loeffelholz
    "I am not an entrant in the Shakespeare Stakes." - Ian Fleming
    "Screw 'em." - Daniel Craig, The Best James Bond EverTM
  • 007Downunder007Downunder Hobart, Australia Posts: 374MI6 Agent
    Agree 100% . Liberal " humour" spiteful beyond belief e.g. Severed head of Trump, calling his son autistic , making jokes about Mitt Romney's African American grandson etc etc.
    Conservatives like Stephen Crowder very funny
    Anthony
  • Number24Number24 NorwayPosts: 22,312MI6 Agent
    Well, David Crocket and the others fought back. The examples 007Downunder mention is of cource horrible, but in my experience not typical. I could just as well mention Trump's mocking of the disabled reporter. But I don't think it represents conservative humor, just as 007DU's examples are hardly typical of liberal humor.
  • HigginsHiggins GermanyPosts: 16,619MI6 Agent
    edited July 2017
    Agree 100% . Liberal " humour" spiteful beyond belief e.g. Severed head of Trump, calling his son autistic , making jokes about Mitt Romney's African American grandson etc etc.
    Conservatives like Stephen Crowder very funny


    The Trump camp becoming defensive - now that's a political joke for sure!

    As for the "autistic son", I am sure that you remember Trump mocking on Serge Kovaleski?
    And the parallel is still not there. Trump's son (Donald Junior??) is not autistic but behaves like he is in his echo-chamber.
    So nobody mocked about an existing handicap - well except Trump himself.


    See what I've done here...

    If anyone from the Trump camp complains about ANY joke from the other side, I recommend checking what candidate Trum said and did during his campain and think again.
    President of the 'Misty Eyes Club'.

    Dalton - the weak and weepy Bond!
  • Number24Number24 NorwayPosts: 22,312MI6 Agent
    edited July 2017
    Why don't we avoid complaining about other people's jokes and consentrate on posting good ones instead?
  • ThunderpussyThunderpussy Behind you !Posts: 63,792MI6 Agent
    edited January 2021
    .
    "I've been informed that there ARE a couple of QAnon supporters who are fairly regular posters in AJB."
  • Number24Number24 NorwayPosts: 22,312MI6 Agent
    Or we could focus on actual jokes, perhaps?
  • LoeffelholzLoeffelholz The United States, With LovePosts: 8,998Quartermasters
    Number24 wrote:
    Well, David Crocket and the others fought back.

    He fought for his life and his country. There's nothing worth fighting for in a liberal echo-chamber...best to just let them beat their chests and watch from the other side of the glass.
    Check out my Amazon author page! Mark Loeffelholz
    "I am not an entrant in the Shakespeare Stakes." - Ian Fleming
    "Screw 'em." - Daniel Craig, The Best James Bond EverTM
  • Number24Number24 NorwayPosts: 22,312MI6 Agent
    It's just a thread to share some funny political jokes, not a competiton between ideologien. Let's just have a laugh, and that's best done if more people join in.
  • ChriscoopChriscoop Belize Posts: 10,458MI6 Agent
    Have a laugh at the expense of those who follow one political ideal and who apparently have no sense of humour it seems
    It was either that.....or the priesthood
  • Number24Number24 NorwayPosts: 22,312MI6 Agent
    I have posted jokes about Obama and both the Clintons. My only criteria for me posting a joke here is that I find it funny. I don't think it's to anyone's benefit if some members feel like victims - join the fun instead! :D
    Many of the jokes here are about Trump or Brexit, anything else would be strange since it's in the news. I would expect the thread to have lost of Obama jokes if it started up years ago.
  • ThunderpussyThunderpussy Behind you !Posts: 63,792MI6 Agent
    edited January 2021
    .
    "I've been informed that there ARE a couple of QAnon supporters who are fairly regular posters in AJB."
  • LoeffelholzLoeffelholz The United States, With LovePosts: 8,998Quartermasters
    edited July 2017
    If a toilet with our president's mouth meets this thread's definition of humour, no, I don't have such a sense of 'humour.' I wouldn't think it was funny if it were Obama, or Hillary, or Merkel, or Blair or whomever. Some seem to be in a race to the sewer. I suppose that's down to taste.

    I'm quite secure in my own sense of humour, and certainly don't have to justify or prove anything to such a group of comic geniuses.

    A question was asked about why conservatives don't contribute here; I gave my opinion. I've previously been called a 'troll' for sharing my opinion on these things - no doubt that will happen now. Very funny stuff, gents.
    Check out my Amazon author page! Mark Loeffelholz
    "I am not an entrant in the Shakespeare Stakes." - Ian Fleming
    "Screw 'em." - Daniel Craig, The Best James Bond EverTM
  • HigginsHiggins GermanyPosts: 16,619MI6 Agent
    As I've posted the toilet in Barcelona, I guess that I am addressed...

    I found it funny, just because it's Trump.
    That's me. You don't like it, don't laugh.

    Again, just look back what candidate Trump let out during his trial incase that that pic offends you.

    I hope that we can continue now with the jokes because if the discussion continues - this will be closed.
    But maybe that's the purpose of some comments recently.
    President of the 'Misty Eyes Club'.

    Dalton - the weak and weepy Bond!
  • LoeffelholzLoeffelholz The United States, With LovePosts: 8,998Quartermasters
    [tosses in another banana]
    Check out my Amazon author page! Mark Loeffelholz
    "I am not an entrant in the Shakespeare Stakes." - Ian Fleming
    "Screw 'em." - Daniel Craig, The Best James Bond EverTM
  • BarbelBarbel ScotlandPosts: 37,825Chief of Staff
    My most sincere apologies, folks, I've been busy most of the weekend and haven't had much time to be here.
    Thread belatedly closed, as could be expected. Not because of political discussion, but because it's getting personal.
    Awaiting PMs.

    Edit 25th July- It's re-opened.
  • Number24Number24 NorwayPosts: 22,312MI6 Agent
    Rule number 1 in shops selling nazi memorabilia and clothes: - The customer is always in the extreme right!
  • ThunderpussyThunderpussy Behind you !Posts: 63,792MI6 Agent
    edited January 2021
    .
    "I've been informed that there ARE a couple of QAnon supporters who are fairly regular posters in AJB."
  • Number24Number24 NorwayPosts: 22,312MI6 Agent
    The Nobel Peace Prize - I'd kill for one of those! B-)
  • ChriscoopChriscoop Belize Posts: 10,458MI6 Agent
    Extreme right wingers hate Nazi Jokes. .... it makes them Fuhrerious ! ;)
    Hitler was misunderstood, all he wanted was peace...
    A peace of Poland, a peace of France.... You know the rest I'm sure :D
    It was either that.....or the priesthood
  • Number24Number24 NorwayPosts: 22,312MI6 Agent
    Jokes from the old Eastern Block:

    Q: What is the difference between socialism and capitalism?
    A: Capitalism makes social mistakes while socialism makes capital mistakes.


    Q: The Central Committee of the Communist Party offered me a job as a secretary. Should I accept?
    A: Yes. Your only duties will be saying, "Yes, Comrade," and at night, "No, Comrade."


    Q: Yesterday, I wanted to buy some bananas, however, at the store there was only one banana and it was past its prime. How is a guy supposed to choose?
    A: The same way you choose during the elections.


    Q: Why is our supply of meat so irregular and unpredictable?
    A: We are advancing towards communism so fast that even the cattle can't keep up anymore.
  • Number24Number24 NorwayPosts: 22,312MI6 Agent
    There's a term for presidents like Trump.
    Probably not two terms though.


    Donald Trump walks into a bar ...
    And lowers it.


    Bill Gates has agreed to pay for Donald Trump's wall.
    On the condition he gets to install windows.



    What's going to replace ObamaCare?
    Don.T.Care


    What's the difference between Donald Trump and an orange?
    An orange has a thick skin.


    A swastika has been spray painted over Donald Trump's star on the Hollywood Walk of Fame.
    The police says it's impossible to tell if it was done by Trump's opponents or his supporters.
  • Number24Number24 NorwayPosts: 22,312MI6 Agent
    edited July 2017
    i-was-gonna-make-a-muslim-joke-but-they-always-2678665.png

    Q: Why did the radical Muslim go to the airport and blow himself up?
    A: He wanted to go everywhere.


    Q: What do bowlers, Thanksgiving guests, and Syrian refugees all have in common?
    A: They all want Turkey.


    Q: What do you get if you cross Islam and Capitalism?
    A: No more jokes about the profit.


    Ramadan - putting the slim back into Muslim
  • Number24Number24 NorwayPosts: 22,312MI6 Agent
    Religious ****

    I don't want to edit everything, so "not so rude word" is:

    ab8218066b2d9c2f7f3507023d079289.png



    Taoism **** happens.

    Buddhism If **** happens, it's not really ****.

    Islam If **** happens, it's the will of Allah.

    Protestantism **** happens because you don't work hard enough.

    Judaism Why does this **** always happen to us?

    Hinduism This **** happened before.

    Catholicism **** happens because you're bad.

    T.V. Evangelism Send more ****.

    Atheism No ****.

    Jehova's Witness Knock knock, **** happens.

    Hedonism There's nothing like a good **** happening.

    Christian Science **** happens in your mind.

    Agnosticism Maybe **** happens, maybe it doesn't.

    Rastafarianism Let's smoke this ****.

    Existentialism What is **** anyway?

    Stoicism This **** doesn't bother me.
  • Number24Number24 NorwayPosts: 22,312MI6 Agent
    edited July 2017
    ISIS-Funny-Jokes.png


    Q: How did Isis move from 5th wanted terrorist group to the most wanted terrorist group?
    A: They cut a head


    Q: What’s the most important part of a joke about ISIS?
    A: The execution


    Q: Have you heard of what ISIS has been doing in the Middle East?
    A: I won’t beheading that way anytime soon



    Q: If ISIS started fighting with North Korea, who would win?
    A: The rest of the world


    Q: Did you hear about the ISIS comedy open mic tonight?
    A: Every single comedian bombed really hard
  • Dirty PunkerDirty Punker ...Your Eyes Only, darling."Posts: 2,587MI6 Agent
    Man: My dog's got no nose.
    Man 2: How does he smell?
    Man: Awful.
    a reasonable rate of return
  • ChriscoopChriscoop Belize Posts: 10,458MI6 Agent
    Labour buying votes by abolishing student loans and wiping out student debt :))
    20170801_180256.jpg
    It was either that.....or the priesthood
  • ThunderpussyThunderpussy Behind you !Posts: 63,792MI6 Agent
    edited January 2021
    .
    "I've been informed that there ARE a couple of QAnon supporters who are fairly regular posters in AJB."
  • Number24Number24 NorwayPosts: 22,312MI6 Agent
    The Onion has revealed President Trump's plan for Containing North Korea:
    http://www.onionstudios.com/videos/trumps-plan-for-containing-north-korea-6139




    More worrying news: South Korea is close to developing a K-pop group capable of reaching the US.
    http://www.theonion.com/article/report-south-korea-developing-new-pop-group-capabl-56555
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