King of the Slobs
DrMaybe
Posts: 204MI6 Agent
I meet a lot of people in my line of work, and usually am going to their homes when they aren't dolled up for regular guests. Consequently, I get to see how they really live, in regards to their cleaning habits anyway.
Currently I'm doing some work for a guy on crutches. Although he's been on them for roughly a month, he's fairly mobile, and I've seen him get around without them. So it's no excuse for his habits. He drops everything on the floor. I'm not talking clumsy. If it hits the floor, it's there forever. There is literally a path thru his house walled by dropped clothes. I assume when he runs low on fresh laundry, he just goes and buys some more. He's also big on dropping change. Probably close to a grand down there if you want to dig thru the undies.
Not one square inch of his kitchen counter is not covered with some kind of debris. He apparently never met a food wrapper he didn't like. I wasn't brave enough to use the head, but I assume that's a masterpiece as well. The punchline to all this is that the guy is a police detective who used to work undercover in biker gangs.
Know any real-life Oscar Madisons?
Currently I'm doing some work for a guy on crutches. Although he's been on them for roughly a month, he's fairly mobile, and I've seen him get around without them. So it's no excuse for his habits. He drops everything on the floor. I'm not talking clumsy. If it hits the floor, it's there forever. There is literally a path thru his house walled by dropped clothes. I assume when he runs low on fresh laundry, he just goes and buys some more. He's also big on dropping change. Probably close to a grand down there if you want to dig thru the undies.
Not one square inch of his kitchen counter is not covered with some kind of debris. He apparently never met a food wrapper he didn't like. I wasn't brave enough to use the head, but I assume that's a masterpiece as well. The punchline to all this is that the guy is a police detective who used to work undercover in biker gangs.
Know any real-life Oscar Madisons?
Comments
I'll admit I'm no Felix Unger, but I have my standards! Fortunately, my wife is a neat-nik herself (much more than me) so my home is nice blend of lived-in and tidy comfort.