Very bad, but fun James Bond jokes.

Alec 006Alec 006 Sydney, AustraliaPosts: 211MI6 Agent
in General James Bond Chat
Okay, in the interests of a good old brainstorm of creativity and crassness, I just invented a terrible Bond joke.

Let's hear yours. NONE you have heard before please, try to make some up… The good the bad and the ugly… all welcome.

Here is mine:

Al Qaida have just trained their own super spy to rival 007. Bombed, James Bombed.

:)) :s 8-)
Always forgive your enemies; nothing annoys them so much.
Oscar Wilde

Comments

  • thesecretagentthesecretagent CornwallPosts: 2,151MI6 Agent
    "Ah, Moneypenny, fancy a shag?"
    "Oh James..."
    "No, really."
    "If you think you can treat me like some plaything to pick up and put down when you want..."
    "Oh, go on Moneypenny..."
    "No!"
    "Oh come on, I'm special forces, you know."
    "What difference does that make?"
    "Oh come on, I'll be in and out before you know anything about it!"
    Amazon #1 Bestselling Author. If you enjoy crime, espionage, action and fast-moving thrillers follow this link:

    http://apbateman.com
  • BlackleiterBlackleiter Washington, DCPosts: 5,615MI6 Agent
    Ahem........I think we should stop now!:007)
    "Felix Leiter, a brother from Langley."
  • GaddGeneGaddGaddGeneGadd Posts: 189MI6 Agent
    I second that BL lol Hey looks like were neighbors, I live outside of Annapolis.
  • BlackleiterBlackleiter Washington, DCPosts: 5,615MI6 Agent
    Greetings Gadd! Good to know there's another solid Bond fan in the vicinity!
    GaddGeneGadd wrote:
    I second that BL lol Hey looks like were neighbors, I live outside of Annapolis.
    "Felix Leiter, a brother from Langley."
  • ThunderpussyThunderpussy Behind you !Posts: 63,792MI6 Agent
    If D Craig keeps on making these turkeys of movies he'll have to change his name to Bernard Mathews. :))

    Paraphrased from "Bleak Expectations " on BBC4 Radio.

    QOS is like having a Treakle Enemma, Messy, Unplesant with sticky Patches. :))
    "I've been informed that there ARE a couple of QAnon supporters who are fairly regular posters in AJB."
  • ThunderpussyThunderpussy Behind you !Posts: 63,792MI6 Agent
    edited October 2011
    Moneypenny asked Bond " can I use your Dictaphone ?" To which he replied " No, use your Finger like everyone else " :))
    "I've been informed that there ARE a couple of QAnon supporters who are fairly regular posters in AJB."
  • jorgem1jorgem1 Posts: 136MI6 Agent
    That reminds me of Johnny English. Have you seen the sequel Johnny English Reborn?
  • ThunderpussyThunderpussy Behind you !Posts: 63,792MI6 Agent
    It's a very Old Gag, :# I've seen Most of Johnny English Reborn But not all of It.
    I'm lucky that I've a Job that Lets me See earily Previews Of many Movies.
    What I've seen of it it seemed pretty Good.
    "I've been informed that there ARE a couple of QAnon supporters who are fairly regular posters in AJB."
  • jorgem1jorgem1 Posts: 136MI6 Agent
    Thunderpussy wrote:
    It's a very Old Gag, :# I've seen Most of Johnny English Reborn But not all of It.
    I'm lucky that I've a Job that Lets me See earily Previews Of many Movies.
    What I've seen of it it seemed pretty Good.


    His name is Bean, James Bean -- the character mix of Bond and Mr. Bean.
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