"Women are like elephants - fun to look at, but hell to have in the house" :v
Now serioulsly: Liking Bond is not a sign that we understand women: Fleming is not famous for understanding and respecting women. Then again, some Bond girls were for more active and independent than most women in fiction when the books were written. Liking Bond does not automaticly make us misogynists (spelling?) either, but it's probably not the best way to learn to understand women. I think we like Bond because it offers compelling characters, good stories and good escapism. I think it offers a fantasy that is appealing to us, and that includes how Bond behaves as a man and abviously the Bond girls are fantasies too.
I understand women. I understand that if I were twenty now, instead of forty, I would be a god in a world of dufesses. Now, by the time I have learned their ways, I'm married with a family, so it's all hypothetical. But for the record, understanding women is easy. For younger or single guys out there, listen up:
1) Never tell them what to do, always suggest, and agree with them when they talk about it, like it was their idea.
2) listen more than talk. If you can remember, ask them what they think.
3) plan their birthdays, anniversaries, etc and never listen when the say "I don't want to do anything fancy..." that's woman for champagne, dancing, roses and a good meal.
4) Enjoy ( or pretend to enjoy) their films, music etc
5) Once in a while, give her a massage without expecting it to lead to sex. It will BTW, and it will be brilliant.
6) Never joke about size and weight. Think of these two things the same as you would your sexual prowess. You only want to hear "the best" she wants to her slim, light, lost a bit of weight, don't need to lose weight, look great etc. it should just slip of your tongue in an instant and without pause.
Of course, this is all a bit of tongue in cheek, but there's a bit of truth in there if you pick at it. And of course, there's the bedroom. I wish I knew this at twenty, but they're ready about five minutes after you've finished, so how you deal with that is both your problem, and your quest... :v :v :v
Ah, so you speak Martian..you seem quite fluent too..
One other thing to add, never take your wife/girlfriend for granted. Tell them often how lucky they are to have them in their life. Random acts of gratitude will go a long way, a lovely text, a card, a random display of affection...works like magic!
Oh and when you are listening, don't ever try and fix the problem...listen, nod, agree....and only when they ask, do you then say "well what do you think?" )
As for your last point, whats the phrase...a car will only perform to its best when well oiled :v )
Face it; they're nuts (not that We aren't, but We can reason our way out of stupidity, given time- females seem impervious to such notions). )
Am I just being a misogynist dinosaur here? ?:)
I'm not sure whether to be deeply offended by your generalisation about our sex...
or to simply ignore you
(.....and you wonder why us women here on AJB don't post very often, can't think why )
Don't let such a silly and plainly bizarre thread put you off, and please if you can try not to tar us all with the same brush. Personally I think the majority of responses have been bemused at best by this odd assertion.
I understand women. I understand that if I were twenty now, instead of forty, I would be a god in a world of dufesses. Now, by the time I have learned their ways, I'm married with a family, so it's all hypothetical. But for the record, understanding women is easy. For younger or single guys out there, listen up:
1) Never tell them what to do, always suggest, and agree with them when they talk about it, like it was their idea.
2) listen more than talk. If you can remember, ask them what they think.
3) plan their birthdays, anniversaries, etc and never listen when the say "I don't want to do anything fancy..." that's woman for champagne, dancing, roses and a good meal.
4) Enjoy ( or pretend to enjoy) their films, music etc
5) Once in a while, give her a massage without expecting it to lead to sex. It will BTW, and it will be brilliant.
6) Never joke about size and weight. Think of these two things the same as you would your sexual prowess. You only want to hear "the best" she wants to her slim, light, lost a bit of weight, don't need to lose weight, look great etc. it should just slip of your tongue in an instant and without pause.
Of course, this is all a bit of tongue in cheek, but there's a bit of truth in there if you pick at it. And of course, there's the bedroom. I wish I knew this at twenty, but they're ready about five minutes after you've finished, so how you deal with that is both your problem, and your quest... :v :v :v
Ah, so you speak Martian..you seem quite fluent too..
One other thing to add, never take your wife/girlfriend for granted. Tell them often how lucky they are to have them in their life. Random acts of gratitude will go a long way, a lovely text, a card, a random display of affection...works like magic!
Oh and when you are listening, don't ever try and fix the problem...listen, nod, agree....and only when they ask, do you then say "well what do you think?" )
As for your last point, whats the phrase...a car will only perform to its best when well oiled :v )
As for your last point... Phoarrrr! :v
Amazon #1 Bestselling Author. If you enjoy crime, espionage, action and fast-moving thrillers follow this link:
Face it; they're nuts (not that We aren't, but We can reason our way out of stupidity, given time- females seem impervious to such notions). )
Am I just being a misogynist dinosaur here? ?:)
Can't tell from your question if you're a: drunk or b: p*ssed off from having a
recent fight with a female or c: all or some of the above.
I'm a male and these type of generalizations of any part of our humanity always makes me wonder if we'll ever spiritually evolve together as a species. Sure, they're are certain general traits that sexes and races and cultures share due to environment and biology and education, but it's always skewed on an individual level for the same reasons. You say males can reason they're way out of stupidity, and many do, but for most, history does not bare that out. War and the male tendancy towards knee-jerk action and violence to solve complex problems are prime examples.
What frustrates many men are females biological ability to communicate on a more intimate and trusting and emotionally fearless level. Yes, in a male world that makes some of them more successible to being taking advance of, but that's not stupidity. To me, it's an evolutionary step up on the spritual level that many men can't seem to grasp. A lot of that comes from fear of intimacy (and historically, intimacy in male dominated societies is a sign of weakness). As long a males hold most of the political and financial power on this planet and fear being dominated or taken advantage of or killed by each other, we'll always be the withering branch on the tree of enlightment and empathy.
Many women do try to feel their way through a problem over a more detached and logical approach, but not all do, just as many men do the opposite - but not all do. Again, we can make generalties about anything, but everyone comes at life with their own unique twist. The trick for all of us, no matter what age or sex or race or culture, is to find the positive human traits in us and focus and promote those over the negative ones that keep us at the primitive level.
Can't tell from your question if you're a: drunk or b: p*ssed off from having a
recent fight with a female or c: all or some of the above.
Those of you out there that picked "b" may email me for your no-prize.
I did attempt to make it funny, though.
I'm a male and these type of generalizations of any part of our humanity always makes me wonder if we'll ever spiritually evolve together as a species.
No. We won't. As long as we fear the unknown & our own selves, it can't happen. Sadly.
The trick for all of us, no matter what age or sex or race or culture, is to find the positive human traits in us and focus and promote those over the negative ones that keep us at the primitive level.
Or to quote a famous Captain, "We're human beings with the blood of a million savage years on our hands! But we can stop it. We can admit that we're killers...but we're not going to kill...today. That's all it takes! Knowing that we're not going to kill...today!"
There are times, usually once a month, when I can't see the reason men and women stayed the course. I just don't understand why early man kept going at it, and we didn't die out as a species...
Amazon #1 Bestselling Author. If you enjoy crime, espionage, action and fast-moving thrillers follow this link:
I think it's a question of understanding each other's differences.
If women understood men, and men understood women, then yes, relationships would be easier, and we probably wouldn't have the arguments we do. But that is up to each of us to figure out how the other one works. We need to take responsibility for that, and not expect the other to come from a place of understanding, if we're not willing to do the same.
Saying that the 'cave man' theory is deep within us, and that men can never evolve is a lazy man's way of saying he can't be bothered... that the way he thinks and acts is the only way, and that all woman are over emotional, over dramatic and can't be reasoned with. When in fact it's their fear to engage with their feelings and to show them - in case someone might witness the fact and judge them on it. (We won't... I promise )
On the other hand, I cringe at how bitchy us women can be, how some of us thrive on drama (or rather the attention it seemingly gives us) and the downright stupidity in which we sometimes conduct ourselves.
But that's the beauty of the sexes. I find men infuriating at times, but I also find them fascinating and refreshingly logical (compared to some of my complicated girlfriends)- each to their own, but taking responsibility for your part in a relationship is the way forward.
Remember, the general rule of thumb is: What you put into your relationship is what you will get out of it.
She's worth whatever chaos she brings to the table and you know it. ~ Mark Anthony
When in fact it's their fear to engage with their feelings and to show them - in case someone might witness the fact and judge them on it. (We won't... I promise )
I once made the mistake of having a tear in my eye during a movie ( Mighty Joe Young )
My Wife Took the Piss out of me for weeks )
"I've been informed that there ARE a couple of QAnon supporters who are fairly regular posters in AJB."
I once made the mistake of having a tear in my eye during a movie ( Mighty Joe Young )
My Wife Took the Piss out of me for weeks )
On one of our first dates I took my Wife to see Star Trek III (for those of you who might not know, the movie begins with Spock's death scene from the previous film)- she said later she'd never seen a guy cry in a movie theatre before, let alone in the first FIVE MINUTES of the flick! )
I think it's a question of understanding each other's differences.
If women understood men, and men understood women, then yes, relationships would be easier, and we probably wouldn't have the arguments we do. But that is up to each of us to figure out how the other one works. We need to take responsibility for that, and not expect the other to come from a place of understanding, if we're not willing to do the same.
Saying that the 'cave man' theory is deep within us, and that men can never evolve is a lazy man's way of saying he can't be bothered... that the way he thinks and acts is the only way, and that all woman are over emotional, over dramatic and can't be reasoned with. When in fact it's their fear to engage with their feelings and to show them - in case someone might witness the fact and judge them on it. (We won't... I promise )
On the other hand, I cringe at how bitchy us women can be, how some of us thrive on drama (or rather the attention it seemingly gives us) and the downright stupidity in which we sometimes conduct ourselves.
But that's the beauty of the sexes. I find men infuriating at times, but I also find them fascinating and refreshingly logical (compared to some of my complicated girlfriends)- each to their own, but taking responsibility for your part in a relationship is the way forward.
Remember, the general rule of thumb is: What you put into your relationship is what you will get out of it.
Dear Lexi, my Wife doesn't like the Walther anywhere near our bed, she says I'm not Linus, and it's not a blanket. But I fear being caught unarmed by evil henchmen. What can I do?
I think it's a question of understanding each other's differences.
If women understood men, and men understood women, then yes, relationships would be easier, and we probably wouldn't have the arguments we do. But that is up to each of us to figure out how the other one works. We need to take responsibility for that, and not expect the other to come from a place of understanding, if we're not willing to do the same.
Saying that the 'cave man' theory is deep within us, and that men can never evolve is a lazy man's way of saying he can't be bothered... that the way he thinks and acts is the only way, and that all woman are over emotional, over dramatic and can't be reasoned with. When in fact it's their fear to engage with their feelings and to show them - in case someone might witness the fact and judge them on it. (We won't... I promise )
On the other hand, I cringe at how bitchy us women can be, how some of us thrive on drama (or rather the attention it seemingly gives us) and the downright stupidity in which we sometimes conduct ourselves.
But that's the beauty of the sexes. I find men infuriating at times, but I also find them fascinating and refreshingly logical (compared to some of my complicated girlfriends)- each to their own, but taking responsibility for your part in a relationship is the way forward.
Remember, the general rule of thumb is: What you put into your relationship is what you will get out of it.
Having been married for almost twenty years, you are on the mark with that last line. My wife has worked in various areas where the bulk of the co-workers were women, and cattiness and back stabbing and jelousy was unbelievable. However, I worked in areas were it was mostly men, and they exhibited similar negative traits. All I can say is, I find in general from my life experiences that whenever there is a serious absence of estrogen, the more the benevolent and spiritual atmosphere drops.
Dear Lexi, my Wife doesn't like the Walther anywhere near our bed, she says I'm not Linus, and it's not a blanket. But I fear being caught unarmed by evil henchmen. What can I do?
)
Just in case this was perceived as a serious question, it's a joke.
Dear Lexi, my Wife doesn't like the Walther anywhere near our bed, she says I'm not Linus, and it's not a blanket. But I fear being caught unarmed by evil henchmen. What can I do?
)
Just in case this was perceived as a serious question, it's a joke.
I realised that....just couldn't think of any witty reply ;% )
She's worth whatever chaos she brings to the table and you know it. ~ Mark Anthony
Sir MilesThe Wrong Side Of The WardrobePosts: 27,757Chief of Staff
Dear Lexi, my Wife doesn't like the Walther anywhere near our bed, she says I'm not Linus, and it's not a blanket. But I fear being caught unarmed by evil henchmen. What can I do?
)
Just in case this was perceived as a serious question, it's a joke.
I realised that....just couldn't think of any witty reply ;% )
Ok...have this one then....
Your wife should only need one type of 'pistol' in the bedroom :v )
Comments
Now serioulsly: Liking Bond is not a sign that we understand women: Fleming is not famous for understanding and respecting women. Then again, some Bond girls were for more active and independent than most women in fiction when the books were written. Liking Bond does not automaticly make us misogynists (spelling?) either, but it's probably not the best way to learn to understand women. I think we like Bond because it offers compelling characters, good stories and good escapism. I think it offers a fantasy that is appealing to us, and that includes how Bond behaves as a man and abviously the Bond girls are fantasies too.
Lexi...your attraction factor just jumped to 10.
advise worth a million...
Interesting. :007)
Don't let such a silly and plainly bizarre thread put you off, and please if you can try not to tar us all with the same brush. Personally I think the majority of responses have been bemused at best by this odd assertion.
As for your last point... Phoarrrr! :v
http://apbateman.com
That was in the past, with different rides. Now I have a quality mount, I take very good care of what's underneath...
http://apbateman.com
http://apbateman.com
Can't tell from your question if you're a: drunk or b: p*ssed off from having a
recent fight with a female or c: all or some of the above.
I'm a male and these type of generalizations of any part of our humanity always makes me wonder if we'll ever spiritually evolve together as a species. Sure, they're are certain general traits that sexes and races and cultures share due to environment and biology and education, but it's always skewed on an individual level for the same reasons. You say males can reason they're way out of stupidity, and many do, but for most, history does not bare that out. War and the male tendancy towards knee-jerk action and violence to solve complex problems are prime examples.
What frustrates many men are females biological ability to communicate on a more intimate and trusting and emotionally fearless level. Yes, in a male world that makes some of them more successible to being taking advance of, but that's not stupidity. To me, it's an evolutionary step up on the spritual level that many men can't seem to grasp. A lot of that comes from fear of intimacy (and historically, intimacy in male dominated societies is a sign of weakness). As long a males hold most of the political and financial power on this planet and fear being dominated or taken advantage of or killed by each other, we'll always be the withering branch on the tree of enlightment and empathy.
Many women do try to feel their way through a problem over a more detached and logical approach, but not all do, just as many men do the opposite - but not all do. Again, we can make generalties about anything, but everyone comes at life with their own unique twist. The trick for all of us, no matter what age or sex or race or culture, is to find the positive human traits in us and focus and promote those over the negative ones that keep us at the primitive level.
I did attempt to make it funny, though. No. We won't. As long as we fear the unknown & our own selves, it can't happen. Sadly. Or to quote a famous Captain, "We're human beings with the blood of a million savage years on our hands! But we can stop it. We can admit that we're killers...but we're not going to kill...today. That's all it takes! Knowing that we're not going to kill...today!"
)
#1.TLD/LTK 2.TND 3.GF 4.GE 5.DN 6.FYEO 7.FRWL 8.TMWTGG 9.TWINE 10.YOLT/QOS
http://apbateman.com
#1.TLD/LTK 2.TND 3.GF 4.GE 5.DN 6.FYEO 7.FRWL 8.TMWTGG 9.TWINE 10.YOLT/QOS
If women understood men, and men understood women, then yes, relationships would be easier, and we probably wouldn't have the arguments we do. But that is up to each of us to figure out how the other one works. We need to take responsibility for that, and not expect the other to come from a place of understanding, if we're not willing to do the same.
Saying that the 'cave man' theory is deep within us, and that men can never evolve is a lazy man's way of saying he can't be bothered... that the way he thinks and acts is the only way, and that all woman are over emotional, over dramatic and can't be reasoned with. When in fact it's their fear to engage with their feelings and to show them - in case someone might witness the fact and judge them on it. (We won't... I promise )
On the other hand, I cringe at how bitchy us women can be, how some of us thrive on drama (or rather the attention it seemingly gives us) and the downright stupidity in which we sometimes conduct ourselves.
But that's the beauty of the sexes. I find men infuriating at times, but I also find them fascinating and refreshingly logical (compared to some of my complicated girlfriends)- each to their own, but taking responsibility for your part in a relationship is the way forward.
Remember, the general rule of thumb is: What you put into your relationship is what you will get out of it.
#1.TLD/LTK 2.TND 3.GF 4.GE 5.DN 6.FYEO 7.FRWL 8.TMWTGG 9.TWINE 10.YOLT/QOS
I once made the mistake of having a tear in my eye during a movie ( Mighty Joe Young )
My Wife Took the Piss out of me for weeks )
#1.TLD/LTK 2.TND 3.GF 4.GE 5.DN 6.FYEO 7.FRWL 8.TMWTGG 9.TWINE 10.YOLT/QOS
Crying at the death of Spock, well you're only Human.
#1.TLD/LTK 2.TND 3.GF 4.GE 5.DN 6.FYEO 7.FRWL 8.TMWTGG 9.TWINE 10.YOLT/QOS
)
#1.TLD/LTK 2.TND 3.GF 4.GE 5.DN 6.FYEO 7.FRWL 8.TMWTGG 9.TWINE 10.YOLT/QOS
Having been married for almost twenty years, you are on the mark with that last line. My wife has worked in various areas where the bulk of the co-workers were women, and cattiness and back stabbing and jelousy was unbelievable. However, I worked in areas were it was mostly men, and they exhibited similar negative traits. All I can say is, I find in general from my life experiences that whenever there is a serious absence of estrogen, the more the benevolent and spiritual atmosphere drops.
#1.TLD/LTK 2.TND 3.GF 4.GE 5.DN 6.FYEO 7.FRWL 8.TMWTGG 9.TWINE 10.YOLT/QOS
I realised that....just couldn't think of any witty reply ;% )
Ok...have this one then....
Your wife should only need one type of 'pistol' in the bedroom :v )
Good one.
#1.TLD/LTK 2.TND 3.GF 4.GE 5.DN 6.FYEO 7.FRWL 8.TMWTGG 9.TWINE 10.YOLT/QOS