Distorted's Rewatching the Bond films
Distorted Humor
Posts: 66MI6 Agent
Ok, Im watching all the bond films, starting with QoS to Dr. No, then finishing with "Skyfall"
quantum of solace (2008) - A review
There is a good idea for a bond film somewhere in quantum of solace. Taking place soon after the events of "Casino Royale" Bond task is to stop a world conspiracy on obtaining a corner on the market in Bolivia on Toilet Paper.
Okay, in all seriousness, it is about cornering the market Bolivia's water supply. As Bond hunts down the men who killed his squeeze Vesper (which is logical.) This is not a bad bond idea, but there are so many weakness in this bond film that it first weakens, then overwealms the film to dropping it into the bottom of the pile bond films. I will first go off on some of the issues with this film before I will finish on the good points.
First great annoyance, instead of thinking of a great new bond moment, it has this weird fetish to replay former bond moments, but all of them are lesser moments. Ranging from a woman dead covered in something on the bed, to doing a "jump out of the plane and grab someone with a parachute." Most of the stunt sequences have been done before, better, in other bond films.
Secondly, the Villains don't do it for me at all. You have a guy who is the mastermind behind the operation, who looks as threatening as a skinny gas attendant, This would not be bad if his chief henchman would have the physicality of taking on Bond. However its another skinny guy. Thus the final fisticuffs between bond and The villain (who five mins after the movie I can't remember his name, Desmond Greene ...I think) has no tension, you be surprised if bond gets a bloody nose in the fight.
The other baddy is a South American wannabe dictator, who at least has the commanding presence and more ability to be the bad. Then they make him into a cardboard cutout rapist-killer-dictator. Very poorly written.
The rest of the cast of characters is poor for one exception. Dench as M is phoning it in and makes zero logical moves in the entire movie. At least in Goldeneye and some of the other films you get why she is boss. Strawberry "Just Fields" fields goes down as one of the worse "bond gals" as her character shows up, is in bed with him in less then 2 mins of the actual movie, does one thing (trips the totally entreating chief henchmen) and then ends up as a homage to Goldfinger, being covered in oil. Totally pointless, and the sex bit was well, oddly cut. The CIA main guy is played as stupid, but without humor. Mathis and Felix are the only competent men in the movie.
Speaking of Mathis, you have a touching bit where he is killed (doing yet another Homage to a bond moment, where bond uses Mathis body to take a bullet for him while Bond hugs him) and bond shows a little gravity, then takes his cash and dumps him in a dumpster with little fanfare. Waaaaaa?????
I could go on on all the bad points of the film, and I haven't touched that it feels like there are entire important plot moments that are completely skipped (Perhaps unwritten), lack of slower moments (needed more moments like the first part pf the DC3 sequence that gives the movie time to breath), and bad editing with very quick edits. But lets go on the good points of this film.
Olga Kurylenko is a very good bond girl. Tough, good looking, exotic, and is actually one of my fave bond girls, up there with the Goldeneye girls and Jane Seymour. She lacks the humor that would make her in the top three, but well done. Daniel Craig is "professional" in his bond, there is no real character development, and he never really has to come though any fights that leave him bloody (except for one that he gets a nose bleed and cut from), and he fails in this movie on any of the one liners. But you can see him as a bond, and that is what you need in a bond film. The Opera House bit is great fun, with him getting people to move and taking photos, though him slapping the guy off the roof was done so much better in The Spy who loved me.
Overall, its disappointing, some more time to rewrite it would make much better film, but as popcorn fare it is workable.
So in my rankings, it takes the default no 1 place, with casino royale (2006) next in the queue.
1. QoS
quantum of solace (2008) - A review
There is a good idea for a bond film somewhere in quantum of solace. Taking place soon after the events of "Casino Royale" Bond task is to stop a world conspiracy on obtaining a corner on the market in Bolivia on Toilet Paper.
Okay, in all seriousness, it is about cornering the market Bolivia's water supply. As Bond hunts down the men who killed his squeeze Vesper (which is logical.) This is not a bad bond idea, but there are so many weakness in this bond film that it first weakens, then overwealms the film to dropping it into the bottom of the pile bond films. I will first go off on some of the issues with this film before I will finish on the good points.
First great annoyance, instead of thinking of a great new bond moment, it has this weird fetish to replay former bond moments, but all of them are lesser moments. Ranging from a woman dead covered in something on the bed, to doing a "jump out of the plane and grab someone with a parachute." Most of the stunt sequences have been done before, better, in other bond films.
Secondly, the Villains don't do it for me at all. You have a guy who is the mastermind behind the operation, who looks as threatening as a skinny gas attendant, This would not be bad if his chief henchman would have the physicality of taking on Bond. However its another skinny guy. Thus the final fisticuffs between bond and The villain (who five mins after the movie I can't remember his name, Desmond Greene ...I think) has no tension, you be surprised if bond gets a bloody nose in the fight.
The other baddy is a South American wannabe dictator, who at least has the commanding presence and more ability to be the bad. Then they make him into a cardboard cutout rapist-killer-dictator. Very poorly written.
The rest of the cast of characters is poor for one exception. Dench as M is phoning it in and makes zero logical moves in the entire movie. At least in Goldeneye and some of the other films you get why she is boss. Strawberry "Just Fields" fields goes down as one of the worse "bond gals" as her character shows up, is in bed with him in less then 2 mins of the actual movie, does one thing (trips the totally entreating chief henchmen) and then ends up as a homage to Goldfinger, being covered in oil. Totally pointless, and the sex bit was well, oddly cut. The CIA main guy is played as stupid, but without humor. Mathis and Felix are the only competent men in the movie.
Speaking of Mathis, you have a touching bit where he is killed (doing yet another Homage to a bond moment, where bond uses Mathis body to take a bullet for him while Bond hugs him) and bond shows a little gravity, then takes his cash and dumps him in a dumpster with little fanfare. Waaaaaa?????
I could go on on all the bad points of the film, and I haven't touched that it feels like there are entire important plot moments that are completely skipped (Perhaps unwritten), lack of slower moments (needed more moments like the first part pf the DC3 sequence that gives the movie time to breath), and bad editing with very quick edits. But lets go on the good points of this film.
Olga Kurylenko is a very good bond girl. Tough, good looking, exotic, and is actually one of my fave bond girls, up there with the Goldeneye girls and Jane Seymour. She lacks the humor that would make her in the top three, but well done. Daniel Craig is "professional" in his bond, there is no real character development, and he never really has to come though any fights that leave him bloody (except for one that he gets a nose bleed and cut from), and he fails in this movie on any of the one liners. But you can see him as a bond, and that is what you need in a bond film. The Opera House bit is great fun, with him getting people to move and taking photos, though him slapping the guy off the roof was done so much better in The Spy who loved me.
Overall, its disappointing, some more time to rewrite it would make much better film, but as popcorn fare it is workable.
So in my rankings, it takes the default no 1 place, with casino royale (2006) next in the queue.
1. QoS
1 - GE, 2 - DN, 3 - CR, 4 - GF, 5 - FYEO, 6 - TLD, 7 - SF, 8 - FRWL, 9 - LALD, 10 - TSWLM, 11 - LTK, 12 - OP, 13 - YOLT, 14 - TB, 15 - MR, 16 - TWINE, 17 - OHMSS, 18 - TND, 19 - DAD, 20 - TMWTGG, 21 - AVTAK, 22 - DAF, 23 - QoS
Comments
I will, I was waiting to if I had Any more comments before going to...
CASINO ROYALE (2006)
First thoughts on the movie.
"This film is in black and white??" (wouldn't it be kinda cool to have a black and white James bond film?)
Anyways, QoS does not appear to be a bad film, till you watch Casino Royale after, which gives you so much more. Since I once again love the movie I will start off with a quick thing. I am still, 6 years after the fact, unsure if the "Chair" bit was needed and made the film better.
Now that I dismissed the one weak part of the film. This is by far Criag's best performance as bond. He starts off as little more then a thug, but you stat to see him growing into the savy, stylish bond we know and love. in the later movies this expected growth has not come to pass.
this movie is almost a overload in bond goodness. We have two great bond cars, once classic, one new. And two great bond girls. And Eva Green is not only stunning in her amazing good looks, but the writers gave her tons of whit and great lines, it is just enjoyable seeing at times the witty talk between Bond and Vesper, and you can easy "buy" the idea that bond fell in love with her. Heck, I know I would.
The action sequences are great, ranging from the "free-running" to the embassy, the airport sequence, the Aston Martin Crash, when bond gets poisoned, to the final gut wrenching shootout in Venice. Any one of those would make a film a worthy action film, and it is a feast to have all of them in one movie.
The bit roles are all great, though I find "M" being rehashed a bit tiring, but this is a minor quibble. The film does not feel too long, as it feels like it has "acts" with first act being the start of the movie to the end of the airport sequence, then followed though the card game to the death of the main bad guy, then the final act the betraying and shootout of in Venice, making Bond... Bond..James Bond.
As you can tell, I really enjoy this film, and it will most likely stay in my top five.
1. CR
2. QoS
Up next is Die Another Day, which is famous (Infamous??) as the most over the top bond film since Moonraker.
it is out, but not out on Netflix when I started.
Yes, I could of rented it at the local grocery store which rents films, but I decided to go with what I had at the start. If you want, I could do the Skyfall review now since I have easier access to it now.
As for reviews....
Die Another Day --
This film is well hated, but I think it gets some unjustified flack. It is not a great film, but it is nowhere near a bad film, and excluding two points, it would be a good bond film. In fact, the first half of the film is quite good.
Quick Plot overview
Bond surfs into North Korea, and plots to uncover a weapons for Blood Diamonds trade. He is betrayed, released, escapes from US/British custody, goes to Cuba, finds a "face alteration" clinic, and a Sexy bond girl named "Jinx", who is also a assassin. In the process he finds some diamonds, that lead to Gustav Graves, and a movie falling off a proverbial cliff. Then it becomes a silly bond film with ice palaces, invisible cars, a plot with a space weapon to burn though landmines to allow north korea invasion of the south.
Now for the good points.
Most bond films have two girls - as explained in the great parody of (Star Trek Deep Space Nine 'Dr. Bashir I presume' episode) one generally dies, the other is saved (barring the newfangled Bond films of course) and your bond girls are Halle Berry playing "Jinx" and Rosamund Pike playing "Miranda Frost", the cool as ice MI6 agent. Both do reasonably good renditions, Halle Berry does look good in a Bikini, but some of her action sequences requires some suspension of disbelief. (I buy that she good at being a spy and shooter, but less on the more physical fighting) Pike's Frost hits the bill as a sexy, cold blooded bad girl who is the bond girl that dies. The only main issue I have is that you have a hard time believing that Jinx can defeat someone who was on the Harvard fencing team at sword play. However I will give credit, sometimes it worth watching just for the bond girls.
There are some very good action sequences, the opening Surfing -> Saved by the bell bit is a entertaining action sequence, no complaints, and the fencing bit at the fencing club is great fun. The "Laser room" fight is entertaining at least, and the final duel fights between the bond girls (having a great catfight) and bond and the villain is more then good enough. I will go over the car chase later when dealing with the bad points.
The plot is on the silly side of bond, but its not really too far out there, and it a plot that is easily followed. I cannot give points or demerit it for the plot...
However, there are some issues with this film.
First off , the theme song is nothing to remember by. You much more remember the fact that bond is being tortured, then the fact that your ears are being tortured by this song. I almost prefer QoS theme song.
Also, Moddonna makes a appearance, blah!
Now to one of the famous bits. The "Invisible" car. its hokey, stupid and actually not needed for the plot except for some laughs, but I question if it was really needed, the whole invisible car trick is too science fiction even for bond. You can buy a exploding pen or a jetpack, and some of the other gadgets the car has, but the invisible car is a major minus, one that drags down the film badly.
the face alteration bit is also so unneeded, in fact, the North Korean who has diamonds embedded into his face would be a really awesome main bad guy, and its disappointing to see they turn him into some sort of European movie star when I was looking forward to have someone else as the bad guy.
Lastly, the ice palace bits adds to the whole "Comic book" feel to it, makes it feel like your reading "Watchmen" and the Night Owl and company have finally found the secret antarctic base of the bad guy.
All these items make "Die Another Day" lukewarm at best. And it gets very disappointing when you realize that if the writers had not gone so outlandish in the second half, you would of had one gem of a bond film.
As for the surfing typhoon, yes, it looks awful, it did not age well.
I thought it was ok, if ended up too much like a comic book. Still better then QoS.
1. Casino Royale
2. Die Another Day
3. QoS
this might not make sense, but the world is not enough is a better film, but not as entertaining as Die Another Day.
the basic plot synopsis is about nuking the black sea so that oil has to go though the med, and thus give one woman massive power.
There is a few things that I find kinda weak, and i will hit on them first.
The action sequences, excepting the ski part with the ultra-lights feels bland at times, stupid at others (helicopters with saw blades) and without much flow at other times (most of the sub action sequences). And Denise Richards just does not have the chops to play something more then a American bimbo. She gets utterly overshadowed.
There is a lot going for it, sophie marceau is flat out awesome as Electra. I think she was at the top of her game, old enough to be taken seriously, youthful enough to be a fem-fatale. Though I totally forgot the boob flash, which made me go "did i just see that in a bond film" and then i felt like a dirty little 14 year old with a VCR. Even when she slowly killing bond with the Garotte chair, she still a sultry presence.
And killing her is rather...epic. "you will miss me" BANG - "I never miss" and bond almost feels for a moment...
the movie does feel somewhat long, even if it does not clock that long. it feels long. If it wasn't for sophie marceau, this movie would be much worse.
1. Casino Royale
2. The World is Not Enough
3. Die Another Day
4. QoS
1. GE 2. MR 3. OP 4. TMWTGG 5. TSWLM 6. TND 7. TWINE 8.DN 9. GF 10. AVTAK
I reserve the option to change the order - I am going with a fresh mind, have to remember, it been almost 10 years since I seen TMWAGG, DAF, and a few other bond films. Heck, I hadn't seen DAD in 5 years. and it was much better then i remembered. Almost put TWINE below DAD actually.