Exceedingly accurate and incredibly true rumours about Bond25
Number24
NorwayPosts: 22,337MI6 Agent
Just like a similar thread about SPECTRE, this topic is for the members who feel the rumours in the press are too believable and well-founded.
I have already heard a rumour about the plot and villan of Bond25. As usual the producers and scriptwriters keep their ears to the ground to make the movies topical and reflective of the worst threats in the news. This time the villan will be a Swedish politician who wants to become General Secretary of the UN and secure politically correct regimes in the western world. Some candidates in the US election have identified this horrible threath, and EON believes they have found a villan most people fear. Behind the scenes the dastardly Swede organises un-PC terrorist attacks such as Miss Universe contestants with suicide bikinis, bulls at Pamplona spiked with the drug speed etc.
These attacks will get PC politicians into office and destroy everything Bond believes in. They will outlaw supercars, explosive pens, sexist puns, vodka martinis etc. More than anything Bond fears mandatory paternity leaves where Bond has to babysit his many illegitimate children
I have already heard a rumour about the plot and villan of Bond25. As usual the producers and scriptwriters keep their ears to the ground to make the movies topical and reflective of the worst threats in the news. This time the villan will be a Swedish politician who wants to become General Secretary of the UN and secure politically correct regimes in the western world. Some candidates in the US election have identified this horrible threath, and EON believes they have found a villan most people fear. Behind the scenes the dastardly Swede organises un-PC terrorist attacks such as Miss Universe contestants with suicide bikinis, bulls at Pamplona spiked with the drug speed etc.
These attacks will get PC politicians into office and destroy everything Bond believes in. They will outlaw supercars, explosive pens, sexist puns, vodka martinis etc. More than anything Bond fears mandatory paternity leaves where Bond has to babysit his many illegitimate children
Comments
#1.TLD/LTK 2.TND 3.GF 4.GE 5.DN 6.FYEO 7.FRWL 8.TMWTGG 9.TWINE 10.YOLT/QOS
M visits Bond but Bond says he's done with saving the world and refuses. M then goes to Blofeld (in prison, obvs) and asks for his help. Blofeld decides to assist MI6 as long as he is given the title of Count Balthazar de Blueville. M reluctantly agrees and Blofeld starts to track down the leader of the terrorist cell using his Spectre connections.
The trail leads to a caravan park in Skegness where, it is rumoured, an ex MI6 agent is responsible.....
And that is exceedingly accurate and incredibly true. I know that, because I made it up.
Well, it's been said from un-PC Sources (who names himself very often :v ) that Putin is "a very bright and talented man" and a "strong leader", so who can blame you? I haven't seen "Occupation" (But my father saw the first season 1940-45), but I hear it's the first thing written by Jo Nesbø that isn't brilliant.
You've read his last couple of books ?
Haven't seen Occupied yet - but I will -{
Yes!!!! Best post I've seen all day!!
We're getting off topic here, but who cares?
Are you refering to the two non-Harry Hole novels set in the 70's? Personaly I liked them.
We are off topic - apologies ;%
I am...I found them rushed and lacking his usual pace...I thought they were rushed to cash in
That's the last info that came through even semi-official channels...
(You heard if here first
Cruise had his own demands. The active action star will do ALL the stunts in the Bond movies of the future. It will require some nifty camerawork to allow Cruise to do the stunts of the henchmen Bond kills off, but Cruise will not let any stuntmen visit the set.
The money saved on stuntmen will be spent on CGI to make Cruise look "At least as tall as Daniel Craig". CGI experts comment that this is fairly easy in the movies themselves, but Cruise's demands are more complex to pull of on talk shows and during premieres.
Congratualations! :007)
Maybe they should look to the past of previous Bond films for inspiration.
In Dr No, Bonds briefing with M we find out that Bonds Beretta jams nearly resulting in his demise, with M stating "You have a license to kill, not be killed".
In From Russia With Love Bond talks about an experience with M in Tokyo, he calls it "Interesting"
In Live And Let Die Bond returns from an unexplained mission in Rome with an Italian agent called "Miss Caruso"
In The Spy Who Loved Me we find out Bond met and became friends with Sheikh Hosein whilst at Cambridge.
Also in that film Bond is on an undisclosed mission in Austria that draws the attention of the KGB.
At the start of Moonraker Bond is returning from an undisclosed mission to Africa.
In Octopussy Bond comes across a character he has previously met called Jim Fanning, the Secret Services' expert in Antiquities.
In Goldeneye Bond has previously met Zukovsky a KGB agent. He shot him in the right knee, and stole his girlfriend and car.
In Tomorrow Never Dies, Paris Carver is an old girlfriend of Bond.
Brainstorming..................................................?
lets see what they come up with.
"Do you expect me to talk? "No Mister Bond I expect you to die"
Also, Dame Judi Dench's agent has confirmed that she will have a cameo in that Bond receives a video from her in which she says...
****SPOILER ALERT****
"Ignore the last video I sent 007. I'd been at the gin again. Whatever you do, don't go to that funeral. It'll end in tears and spoil everything my new boyfriend has worked hard for. Gotta dash, Ernst wants me to rub coconut oil into his hair."
Honest, I've not made this up (I have)!!!
And I've just read somewhere on the world famous The Internet (I made this up too) that Blofeld reveals that, in addition to being Bond's foster brother, he is also having an illicit affair with Madeline Swann because, to use Blofeld's phrase in the leaked script (that I also made up) he knows it will rile dear James.
Anyway, Bond takes off on a mission, promising to be careful and return to Madeleine. She berates him for spending too much time on "secret missions" and enters into her own "secret mission" with Blofeld. She ends up with a bun in the oven and gives birth to a child. Bond, meanwhile, tries to escape some baddies, gets shot, and his baby takes over as the next James Bond, starting a new story arc called James Bond Jnr.
Oh I must stop drinking Vespers...
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