26 Reply by Diabolik

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Re: No discussion: The political jokes thread

http://i134.photobucket.com/albums/q104/midvalley9/1469040237566.jpg

1.TSWLM 2.LTK 3.YOLT 4.OHMSS 5.TWINE 6.LALD 7.MR 8.GE 9.DN 10.FRWL
Bond: Pierce Brosnan  Villain: Hugo Drax  Girl: Pam Bouvier

27 Reply by Higgins

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Re: No discussion: The political jokes thread

Tony Blair announces a campaign AGAINST Brexit.

That MUST be a joke  ajb007/insane

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28 Reply by Thunderpussy

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Re: No discussion: The political jokes thread

ajb007/lol  If anyone can. In Blair's mind, He can !

“I didn’t lose a friend, I just realised I never had one.”

29 Reply by Number24

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Re: No discussion: The political jokes thread

I asked my friend in North Korea how he was. He said he can't complain.


Q: How many North Koreans does it take to screw in a light bulb?
A: None. The Supreme Leader says we are okay to be in the dark.



Did you know that in North Korea, their military always marches to the left?
It's because in North Korea they have no rights.



Dark Humor is like food in North Korea.
Not everyone gets it.



https://img.memecdn.com/north-korea-in-a-nutshell_o_1243693.jpg




http://www.ghettoredhot.com/wp-content/uploads/2016/01/instagram-pic-meme.jpg

30 Reply by Higgins

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Re: No discussion: The political jokes thread

https://s22.postimg.cc/brn4okyxr/IMG_0876.jpg?dl=1&_ga=1.208854290.1455548664.1468347645



https://s14.postimg.cc/rf05youq7/IMG_0877.jpg?dl=1&_ga=1.249814662.1455548664.1468347645

https://s14.postimg.cc/9dh10w0pb/IMG_0878.jpg?dl=1&_ga=1.218707865.1455548664.1468347645

Last edited by Higgins (19th Feb 2017 13:31)

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31 Reply by Number24

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Re: No discussion: The political jokes thread

General Flynn recieved a letter from Moscow. When a single red tulip fell out,  his face turned white as a sheet.....   ajb007/shifty

32 Reply by Number24

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Re: No discussion: The political jokes thread

Trump promised to drain the swamp,  but instead he's going full Colonel Kurtz  ajb007/lol

33 Reply by Thunderpussy

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Re: No discussion: The political jokes thread

There is a Shakespeare  code predicting the future.  In a letter to Ann Hathaway he tells her
"Love  Labour's Lost"

“I didn’t lose a friend, I just realised I never had one.”

34 Reply by Number24

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Re: No discussion: The political jokes thread

This joke may be slightly outdated ,  but it still qualifies:

It's 1940 and a German company is driving through rural Norway. Suddenly a pig runs in front of one of the trucks and gets killed. It's the early days of the occupation and the Germans are trying to win the hearts and minds of the Norwegians. Their commander ordens a corporal to walk to the nearly farm,  tell the family what happened and express regret on behalf of the Wermacht. After half an hour the corporal returns. "How did they take the news?" asked the Captain. "Surprisingly well." replied the corporal. "They all cheered, shook my hand and offered me a drink."  The Captain was pleased: "What did you tell them?" The corporal saluted and said: "Heil Hitler!  The swine is dead."

35 Reply by cheld

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Re: No discussion: The political jokes thread

The word “politics” is derived from the prefix “poly”, meaning “many”, and the word “ticks”, meaning “blood sucking parasites”.

36 Reply by Number24

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Re: No discussion: The political jokes thread

A bedroom in Bethlehem, West Bank in Palestine/Israel in a new guesthouse decorated with an artwork by Banksy.

https://i.guim.co.uk/img/media/3cd8180871688b39f38c44500675c9e5785b8add/0_0_1024_768/master/1024.jpg?w=1010&q=55&auto=format&usm=12&fit=max&s=efd03f1fada2f9de7ebea5d35a458e05

37 Reply by Number24

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Re: No discussion: The political jokes thread

More street-art from Banksy:

http://d2jv9003bew7ag.cloudfront.net/uploads/08-Banksy-Birds-of-a-Feather-photo-courtesy-banksy.co_.uk_-865x577.jpg


https://dg19s6hp6ufoh.cloudfront.net/pictures/612727298/large/150416banksyUKIP.jpeg?1437929971


http://2.bp.blogspot.com/-J0dNBFlBn3g/UEuAoqbXTyI/AAAAAAAAACw/yxBPUIqkjfY/s640/banksy-graffiti-street-art-palestine3.jpg


https://tifosoarchitecture.files.wordpress.com/2008/08/one-nation-under-cctv_newman-st_london_august_2008-h.jpg

38 Reply by Silhouette Man

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Re: No discussion: The political jokes thread

One Nation under the Tesco carrier bag flag.  ajb007/biggrin

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39 Reply by Ammo08

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Re: No discussion: The political jokes thread

Sally Mullihan of Coral Springs, Fla decided to take one of the jobs that most Americans are not willing to do.
Sally applied for a job in a Florida lemon grove and
seemed to be far too qualified for the job. She had a liberal arts degree from the University of Michigan and had worked as a social worker and a school teacher.
The foreman frowned and said, "I have to ask you, have you had any actual experience in picking lemons?"
"Well, as a matter of fact, I have," she said:
"I've been divorced three times, owned two Chryslers and I voted twice for Obama."
She starts work in the morning!

"I don't know if the world is being run by smart people who are putting us on or imbeciles who mean it."-Mark Twain
'Just because nobody complains doesn't mean all parachutes are perfect.'- Benny Hill (1924-1992)

40 Reply by Number24

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Re: No discussion: The political jokes thread

Pros and Cons of a two-party system (from The Onion)



PRO

Easier to grasp for populace that becomes quickly overwhelmed when presented with too many chip options at the supermarket

Cultivates a fundamentally American ‘us versus them’ mindset

Saves precious time that would have been wasted confronting multiple nuanced positions along a spectrum of political ideology

You’ll probably get your way every four to eight years

CON
Unfairly limits the options available to lobbyists

Perpetuates false notion that the U.S. government isn’t controlled by a single top-secret, monolithic political organization composed of the world’s most powerful elites

Stifles the creativity of political cartoonists who have so much more than elephants and donkeys to give

Voter turnout generally higher in single-party dictatorships

41 Reply by Higgins

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Re: No discussion: The political jokes thread

Another example, that reality beats satire:

According to Gen. David Perkins, a US ally managed to  shoot down a US$ 200,-- drone with a Patriot missile.

Patriots are 3 Millions each - must have happened somewhere in Scotland if you are asking me  ajb007/biggrin

https://youtu.be/6v7nfB5bV3E

Last edited by Higgins (16th Mar 2017 07:43)

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42 Reply by Higgins

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Re: No discussion: The political jokes thread

Today, Angela Merkel is meeting POTUS in Washington.

Just heard a commentary on CNN saying that the leader of the free world is meeting Donald Trump

Had a big laugh!  ajb007/lol  ajb007/lol  ajb007/lol

President of the 'Misty Eyes Club'.
-------Dalton - the weak and weepy Bond!------
FIRST TO DISCOVER substantial evidence that Chew Mee is in fact not totally nude in the TMWTGG pool scenes!

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43 Reply by Silhouette Man

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Re: No discussion: The political jokes thread

Higgins wrote:

Today, Angela Merkel is meeting POTUS in Washington.

Just heard a commentary on CNN saying that the leader of the free world is meeting Donald Trump

Had a big laugh!  ajb007/lol  ajb007/lol  ajb007/lol

I know, that's Theresa May!  ajb007/lol  ajb007/tongue

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44 Reply by Chriscoop

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Re: No discussion: The political jokes thread

Biggest political joke of the week is the Dutch hard right winger Geert wilders

https://s28.postimg.cc/hr121omah/20170317_204124.jpg

I wonder if he uses trumps barber?

It was either that.....or the priesthood

45 Reply by Number24

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Re: No discussion: The political jokes thread

Silhouette Man wrote:
Higgins wrote:

Today, Angela Merkel is meeting POTUS in Washington.

Just heard a commentary on CNN saying that the leader of the free world is meeting Donald Trump

Had a big laugh!  ajb007/lol  ajb007/lol  ajb007/lol

I know, that's Theresa May!  ajb007/lol  ajb007/tongue

No!  That's NATO General Secretary Jens Stoltenberg.  ajb007/biggrin

46 Reply by Higgins

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Re: No discussion: The political jokes thread

I think, that you both, N24 and SM did not get the joke  ajb007/shifty

President of the 'Misty Eyes Club'.
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47 Reply by Number24

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Re: No discussion: The political jokes thread

I thought I did.....  ajb007/insane
Was it Merkel as the leader of the free world and not Trump (in spite of that role being traditionally that of POTUS?)

48 Reply by Higgins

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Re: No discussion: The political jokes thread

ajb007/cheers

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-------Dalton - the weak and weepy Bond!------
FIRST TO DISCOVER substantial evidence that Chew Mee is in fact not totally nude in the TMWTGG pool scenes!

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49 Reply by Number24

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Re: No discussion: The political jokes thread

ajb007/cool  (I'm so proud!)

50 Reply by Silhouette Man

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Re: No discussion: The political jokes thread

Number24 wrote:

I thought I did.....  ajb007/insane
Was it Merkel as the leader of the free world and not Trump (in spite of that role being traditionally that of POTUS?)

Yes, I got it too, but was just joking around there, Higgins.  ajb007/smile

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